one and only





SYONKUL / EXPLICIT / 24.3K















SUMMARY




Sion finally speaks: “Well, I’m kind of pent up. So I was gonna watch porn and jerk off. If that’s- if that’s okay with you.”

It comes from so out of the blue that it takes a second for Riku to process this. “Oh, so you-” Then he looks away and his mind echoes the words Sion hyung and porn and jerking off and SION HYUNG WATCHING PORN AND JERKING OFF? “I- I see. Well, that’s- if you want to, then you should.” 

The offer shouldn’t even feel like this big of a deal when it isn’t anything unusual between alpha groupmates, or at least it wasn’t back when they were trainees. But Sion hasn’t- with Riku, he’s never- well, neither of them have ever mentioned their dicks at all. So.

“Then… um. If you wanna stay, you can stay…” Sion is still a little twitchy but his voice lowers. “We could- you know.”

Riku isn’t an idiot so he isn’t going to ask you really wanna watch porn and jerk off with me, hyung? but he’s thinking it. He’s thinking it really, really hard. “Sure,” Riku says. “I could- I could let off steam, too.”

“Alright, then. Then let’s…” Sion smiles. “Let’s do it.”

-

Riku is the second eldest in NCT New Team; he’s an alpha; he would also rather be an omega and that’s something he’s taking to his grave. Riku also has a crush on his alpha leader and he’s also taking that to the grave. Because Sion hyung would never like him back nor would he confess in the middle of them watching bitching porn together, right? Right?





TAGLIST





  • Idolverse
  • Vaguely canon compliant 
  • Takes place during NCT New Team era
  • Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics
  • Alpha Oh Sion
  • Alpha Maeda Riku
  • Mutual Pining
  • Friends to Lovers
  • Confessions
  • Getting Together
  • Pack Dynamics
  • Found Family
  • Secondary Gender Dysphoria (my tag now)
  • Explicit Sexual Content
  • Mutual Masturbation
  • Sion has a big dick
  • Hyung Kink
  • Bitching/mentions of bitching
  • Ass Play
  • Handjobs
  • Frotting
  • Praise Kink
  • Comeplay
  • Mentions of knotting
  • Scenting
  • Dom/sub















one and only






AUTHOR’S NOTE: 

happy bday beanie. i hope u like this. 

there’s no reason this fic is so long but as usual i got too silly and now it’s way longer than any plotless oneshot should be. warning for extremely tender yearning and also riku alpha secondary gender dysphoria

ive actually had this idea for eons (as in alpha x alpha syonkul jerking off tgt and sion learning riku wants to be bitched) and when my beloved beanie told me she wanted mutual masturbation i decided to take the plunge. LOL

enjoy!!!!




“Nii-chan! Sion hyung’s stinking up the practice room again!” Ryo’s calling out first thing on a Monday morning. And it isn’t strange that Riku hears this less than an hour after arriving at work, sure, but that doesn’t mean the complaint is any less ridiculous. 


“What?” Riku shouts back, a little aghast. “What do you want me to-”


“Tell him to stop!” And, well, that’s only more ridiculous. 


They’re in the midst of their predebut preparations, for god’s sake, and this is what the pup is complaining about? Really, sometimes Riku can’t help but think about how nice it’d be if he could tell Ryo to check his priorities but unfortunately their maknae is only fifteen and also that’s Sion’s job, you know, to keep them in check. And yet he’s still tempted because for some reason his kid seems to be under the impression that he would tell their leader to stop being all- what would he even say? Hyung, I’m sorry, the pups are petulant little babies and they’ll never even know just how good you smell. No, that’s- there’s no way in hell.


“You’ll be fine, just plug your nose!” Riku calls back right before chugging down half of his water bottle in the hallway outside. He needs a break from Sion’s scent, too, but no one needs to know that. And in that same vein no one needs to know that it isn’t because their leader stinks but rather that his scent is a little… well. 


This time Ryo sticks his head out of the practice room door just far enough to send him puppy eyes. “But can’t we scent instead? It’ll make me feel better!”


Riku should be used to this by now and he is, in fact, very used to all of it. Even a few months ago he would’ve argued over the insanity of Ryo’s logic but it’s still so early in the morning and he’s still so tired and they still have such a long day ahead of them, and so Riku just sighs. There’s no point in fighting, is there? As always, it takes so little for him to cave and beckon his pup in closer. “You’re so- you’re ridiculous. Come here.”


All of this nonsense isn’t for a lack of trying to keep all of them sane, either, but it’s mid-2023 and Riku’s finally realizing just how fucking weird it is to be one of the eldest members in a kpop boy group. And sure, maybe that realization is coming a little late considering Riku’s already had a year at SM to plan for the inevitability, but now NCT New Team is slated for debut and he and Sion hyung are the only members with designations and it’s just a really strange dynamic that their new family is growing into. Training to become an idol is complicated enough and pack dynamics are even more so and everything all together is a lot to deal with when you’re suddenly expected to play some kind of alpha hyung role, so it’s just- it’s still a little overwhelming at times. Or, well, most of the time.


“I’m not ridiculous,” Ryo insists even as he snuggles in close, dance practice sweat and all. “You just smell better than Sion does.”


There’s something a little unusual about this kid, isn’t there? Riku still has no idea why the hell the pups in their group love his alpha scent so much but even then he just huffs out a sigh and runs a wrist over Ryo’s nape. “Yeah, well, you just need to get used to him. We’re both alphas anyway, so I don’t get why you and Saku act so weird about it...”


Ryo just nuzzles into his neck, though, huffing like what his Nii-chan said is silly. “We’re not weird. It’s ‘cause you smell like home.”


Wow. It’s hard for Riku to complain when his Ryo-chan says something so sweet, never mind that this has just become their routine now that Lastart is over and the six of them have all been herded into one awkward group; there are four pups in their pack and none of them seem to have gotten the memo that their Riku-nii’s supposed to be a scary alpha because they all just treat him like a glorified dame. And that’s… well, okay, that’s fine too. But it’s also a little confusing considering his designation as an alpha - and as their hyung - though it’s not like anyone in this pack really ever seemed all that normal to begin with. So maybe this, too, is just par for the course…


It’s Sion who comes out to find them only moments later. “Is my scent really that bad today?” Their leader is soaked in sweat from dancing and he presses his hands over his nape as if that could mask the reek of espresso perpetually hanging in the air. “Sorry, Ryo-chan, I’ll try to control it more…” 


Sion looks meeker than usual, too, and that’s kind of ridiculous because it’s been months and the pups are still acting like his scent killed their families or something. So Riku pinches Ryo in the side and the kid just shakes his head. “It’s still too early,” Ryo mumbles in a petulant little voice. “I wanna smell like Riku-nii for a bit...”


It’s funny how he’s fifteen and still acts like an honest-to-god child about these things but that isn’t out of character either. Sion’s eyes meet Riku’s and his gaze is a little more subdued than the usual fiery stare. Sorry, his leader mouths, I’ll work harder…


Riku flushes a little but that’s because Sion’s handsome like this even now, drenched in sweat and wearing a tank top and making those pouty eyes at him. But that’s- that’s just typical, too, and Riku doesn’t need his apologies anyway. He shakes his head and mouths back: It’s fine, hyung. Because really, it is - it’s not like he’s gonna start dissuading these kids now, so.


It’s on instinct that Riku averts his eyes but when they sweep very briefly back up to Sion’s face, he’s still looking at him. And this time his hyung asks out loud: “You’re sure?” Sion always does that, too, double checking everything with everyone because he’s good at his leader role to the point that it just bleeds into everything he says.


“Yeah.” Riku braves eye contact for two whole seconds before he can feel his ears warm up and then he breaks it again. “Ryo-chan’s gonna get used to your scent eventually, so.”


Ryo just clings to him even closer in lieu of a real response and it’s admittedly still weird that Riku and Sion can even commiserate in their hyung-ship together when the rest of their members are basically still kids - well, Yushi’s getting up there but if anything he’s the most maknae-behaving out of all of them - but Sion only seems grateful for the support because he smiles and saves Riku the embarrassment by finally looking away, too. It’s a relief when that stare of his is so fucking unrelenting…


“Alright. Then- then just don’t take too long out here, okay?” Sion hyung backs off quickly like he always does, at least, stepping away when they both nod back at him. Again, he’s a little too good at the leader thing and with time he’s only getting more adept at playing the role. 


“Okay, hyung!” Ryo’s voice is sweeter this time because that’s just how he is with Sion, you know, perpetually bratty and a menace and always playing coy.


“Yeah…” Riku echoes. Sion’s scent is still strong in the air and the smell of espresso alone makes something in his belly churn. And maybe it’s shameful that his leader’s scent can do that to him, yeah, but he’s used to this too. Ugh.


“Five minutes,” Sion nods back at them. And then, turning back into the practice room with a smile, he’s gone. 


“I just wish it wasn’t so strong,” Ryo complains once he’s sure Sion’s out of earshot. “It smells like we’re in a cafe all the time…” The comment is innocent enough but Riku still has to hold his tongue because he doesn’t think anyone on this earth could smell better than Oh Sion does, except obviously- obviously he can’t say that. The pups think that Riku in comparison smells like flowers and pastries and all things lovely despite being an alpha himself, so it’s just a little bizarre.


Riku just hugs his pup tight and only chides once: “Well, I wish you were less clingy.” And then he grins when that makes Ryo whine into his neck. 


“Nii-chan, how could you!” And really, hypocritical opinions on alpha scents and all, they’ll be just fine. 


The day trudges on and it’s as typical as it gets - they run through their first dress rehearsal of NCT Nation stage, some vocal lessons, the usual Korean or Japanese classes - and the kids, as usual, cling to Riku like they always do. He’s stretching out on the ground hours and hours later when a very familiar pair of arms wrap around his neck and it takes him about two seconds to realize that this particular pair of arms belongs to Sakuya. A petulant voice even rumbles: “Riku-nii...”


“Hm? What’s wrong?” Riku leans back to ruffle Sakuya’s hair. Over the past few months it’s just become reflex to double check on the pups with the chaos of their schedules but Sakuya just noses into Riku’s scent gland and pays him very little mind otherwise. So it must be nothing, huh. Their youngest is usually a lot more mopey when he’s upset.


“Everyone else stinks,” Sakuya mumbles. “Especially Sion hyung.”


“Ah…” Riku says in response. Though he’s not surprised at all, is he, because at this point Sakuya and Ryo may as well be on a crusade to complain about their leader’s scent at any given opportunity. “Oi, come on, you should be nicer to him.”


Sakuya isn’t a petulant type of kid, either, not like most of the members in this group are. But he just huffs a little and says: “You don’t stink like he does…”


Well, it’s not like this isn’t an everyday-thing anyway. Sakuya has a sensitive nose and Sion’s alpha pheromones are pretty strong compared to the rest of theirs and they all have to go without scent blockers to adjust to the pack dynamics, too, so the younger pups are usually much more grouchy about it. But even still, there are always moments like these where Riku can’t help but feel a little out of his depth. While he’s been looking after Sakuya and Ryo ever since they first joined the Japanese trainee cohort, it’s just a little ridiculous that they’re still like this, you know, clingy and whiny and begging to be scented like they’ll die if their Nii-chan doesn’t dote on them every second of every day. 


And Riku loves them both dearly, of course, it’s just a little unconventional when pups their age shouldn’t really be drawn to any alpha scents at all. And yet…


“Sion doesn’t stink,” Riku scolds in Japanese. But that’s just on principle, you know, since their leader is so damn stringent about the respect-your-elders-thing and sometimes he’ll get pouty over the kids complaining about his scent. “It’s only because he’s an alpha, Saku. You’ll get used to it. But you know I’m also-” And then Riku yelps when a second body suddenly throws itself at him because that, too, can only be his other pup. “Ryo, seriously!”


“Nii-chan, scent me again,” their second maknae is happy to roll all over his lap and nuzzle his face into Riku’s stomach like the clingiest little leech ever. “Everyone stinks and you smell so good.”


Riku just sighs - he only has himself to blame for this when he’s been enabling them for over a year - and wipes his sweaty wrists over both of their scent glands. “You guys drive me crazy,” he says in his usual exasperated-yet-always-fond voice. “And you always act like I’m your dame, too. I don’t get it.”


“Well, of course,” Ryo chirps back innocently. “You may as well be, Nii-chan, you act like a dame.”


Sakuya nods too, nosing into him again. “Yeah, and you smell like my mom…”


And, well. Riku could complain but he’s better off just accepting his fate, right? So that’s why he sighs again, holds his pups close, and nuzzles into them. If they want him to be their dame he just may as well be their dame. 


“Fine,” Riku squeezes them into his arms. “Then c’mere so I can scent you properly.”


It’s true that the relationships in NCT New Team are a bit unconventional on principle but Riku would also never deny them this; he doesn’t need to make anything stressful for the kids when it’s been hard enough to be thrust into a pack they all only half-knew the members of and made to spend all waking hours singing and dancing and gearing up for their group activities. They’re all adjusting to the foreign nature of their unit and so all of this has been a slow process. And it’s also been a very involved, very complicated, very precarious process. But Sion - who is their leader, their now-hyung - is still the only other presented member amongst them and sometimes it’s just a little bit strange that he and Riku allegedly have each other to relate to when there’s, like… well, you know. There’s just about zero overlap between them even in their designations. 


Sion is the epitome of an alpha in most ways while Riku is juggling two pups like an honest-to-god dame and it’s gotten to the point that most people outside of their management team assume he’s an omega until he breaks the news that he is, unfortunately enough, also an alpha. Sometimes Riku doesn’t know if that’s something he should be worried or offended about given his own designation, though; sometimes he doesn’t know if it’s bad that he’s neither offended nor worried and he loves it, actually, playing the role as their dame. That’s not very alpha of him, is it? But again, maybe that’s the whole issue. He barely even- really, Riku has no inclination to be an alpha at all. 


The pups nuzzle into him and Riku tries not to be resentful because he shouldn’t be resentful, you know, that he’s stuck in this designation. Isn’t he better off being an alpha anyway? Being a male omega comes with so much baggage and in their line of work betas are usually tossed to the side and of course the more alpha you are, the more fans flock to you. But Riku has Sion to be compared to and so many people want him to play into his role and even then he still doesn’t feel much like an alpha to begin with. And that’s… it’s something he’s contending with, his secondary gender, even though he probably would’ve been better off presenting as anything else. 


He would’ve preferred presenting as anything else, too, or even as one specific designation in particular. Riku’s made a habit of ignoring those thoughts but in the moments where no one needs him to play alpha, the yearning just tends to naturally rise up to the surface. Ryo squeezes him around the waist and Sakuya nuzzles into his scent gland and it just feels like he was meant to be a dame rather than an older brother…


But, like, it’s fine. Or at least it’ll be fine because it just has to be. Riku has no choice in the matter anyway, right?


“How long do you think it’ll take before I present?” Ryo asks later, of all things, as they’re herded back into the company van and dead on their feet and starving for dinner. Sakuya’s gone to bother Yushi but Ryo has an arm curled around Riku’s bicep; that isn’t unusual, either, because admittedly they always like being within grabbing distance of each other.


“You’re only sixteen, baby. It’ll take years.” Riku’s voice is a little wry but that’s because he’s too tired for the shenanigans and also the idea of Ryo presenting early is ridiculous. He’s still just a baby, isn’t he? And hopefully it’ll stay that way forever.


“Yeah, but you and hyung both presented early,” Ryo points out. And in all fairness he’s right about that. But then he leans into Riku’s space and turns even more needling, if such a thing is even possible: “And I’d be an alpha too, right? Right, Nii-chan? Don’t you think I’d be the perfect alpha?”


Riku grins something tired but fond all the same because the idea of his little Ryo-chan growing up into a big scary alpha is just funny, mostly. “Hey, maybe, but you’ve still got a long way to go,” he chides while ruffling the pup’s hair. “We haven’t even debuted yet, there’s no need to be in any rush to grow up. You don’t wanna be old and decrepit like me and your hyung are…”


Riku tries not to lecture the kids because that’s Sion’s job, but still, it just kind of happens sometimes; Ryo’s bottom lip juts out and he still leans right into Riku’s hand with a little nuzzle. “I guess that’s true…” But then he sends him a look: “Since when were you decrepit?”


And, well, Riku just laughs. It’s not like his kids will be presenting any time soon anyway.


This conversation is only typical in a group of mostly-pups, too, but they’re all seemingly hell-bent on presenting as alphas and Riku couldn’t relate to something less when his own feelings on his designation are so mixed if not a little self-loathing. Riku’s ancestral bloodline is omega-dominant - as in dominant to the point that him presenting as anything else was unprecedented - and so he had been expecting to be an omega for most of his life and even now a part of him still has a hard time believing that he’s supposed to live as anything otherwise. But Riku still ended up becoming an alpha, didn’t he? Unfortunately it’s a lot easier to be an alpha in this industry and also the company thinks the more alphas the better and also the fans are obsessed with idol designations on top of everything else. Again, it’s all so fucking weird. And Riku hates it, too, having to play this role that his biology and the fans demand of him…


But maybe one day he’ll finally get used to it, right? Er, well, hopefully. Riku still has his doubts but being doubtful isn’t serving him this close to debut, so.


It’s after a few moments of Ryo nosing into him before the pup seems to have had enough scenting and finally relents. And then he turns to Sion, who’s scrolling on his phone on his other side. “Hyung,” Ryo’s voice drawls in the aegyo they’ve all come to learn that their leader just loves, “can we have chicken for dinner?” Of course that’s what he’s thinking about now, huh.


“Hm?” As usual, Sion is delighted by their maknae’s cutesy tone. “You wanna eat chicken, aegi?”


The maknaes never mind kissing ass even though Yushi always scowls about Sion making the pups act cutesy with him, but their leader ruffles Ryo’s hair and his smile is fond and good-natured and reliable like it always is. Never mind all the squabbling over his scent, huh? Ryo leans into Sion’s hand and nods too.


“Yeah… practice was hard so I need chicken to cheer me up…” The wide eyes are unnecessary and yet Hirose Ryo has always been awfully good at getting what he wants. Sion laughs something delighted and Riku has to look away because sometimes Sion hyung is just really handsome when he laughs, and again, his scent is always hanging around. And it still- it makes Riku’s stomach clench. 


“You know you have to ask the managers about dinner, not me,” Sion coos. “But hyung will make sure you get chicken, Ryo-chan, okay? I’ll get you whatever you want.”


Ryo grins, delighted by Sion’s doting, and it’s still a little insane how adept their hyung is at these things; he’s always been suspiciously talented at being a leader and dealing with the maknaes and navigating interpersonal relationships like it all just comes naturally to him. Riku can hardly compare them as alphas - and he’d be stupid if he did - but he still feels like a stranger in his designation when Sion is basically the perfect embodiment of what every alpha should be like. In these moments he’s especially sweet but there isn’t ever a time he isn’t absurdly good to them, really, and admittedly that’s made Riku both fascinated by his leader and also vaguely obsessed with him. It’s dumb, but sometimes Riku wishes he could be a pup because it’s so easy for Ryo to latch right onto Sion’s side and lean into his space and ask his hyung for ice cream, too. It’s so easy for him to seek out comfort and reassurance from their Sion hyung and yet Riku has to play his role still, still, still…


He wishes he could run into Sion’s arms and seek out comfort and all the reassurance he wants. That’s the thing - Sion is very good at giving out both of those things and Riku likes him a little too much on principle and he’s been ignoring that, of course, the not-crush he has. But it’s just hard to not be swayed by an alpha who acts so kindly to his pups, so Riku can’t help but feel like- well, none of this is fair, is it? His designation, his role in the group, how much he likes his leader; none of it is fair at all.


“Ice cream? I think we have some at home…” Sion’s as lenient with the food situation as ever, as their managers are stringent about dieting and yet he’s the one who sneaks them sweets when no one’s looking and insists that hard work should always be rewarded with cake. “But if we don’t, I’ll go run out and get you some.”


“Really?” Ryo acts like Sion isn’t always like this, too, though they have some variation of this conversation pretty much every single day. “Just for me?”


“No, for all of you,” Sion pinches his cheek. “Otherwise you guys are gonna dig into my stash again. I haven’t forgotten about that, you know.”


And, well, at the mention of the Maknae Line Ice Cream Theft, Ryo’s smile turns a little less coy and a little more embarrassed because Sion’s been dragging the situation out for weeks. “Yeah, well,” Ryo mumbles. “It was Saku’s idea, so…”


Sion pinches him again. “Really, I know it was yours. You tricked Saku and Daeng into misbehaving, didn’t you?” And he’s teasing, mostly, but that only makes Ryo look away with a guilty little expression because of course he’s right about that. 


Their pup pouts. “I didn’t…” But Sion just laughs and squeezes a hand over his nape and then Ryo’s smiling again.


Riku’s in a bit of a subdued state from practice and their long day and everything else on top of that but the other two are in a teasing mood and admittedly none of this is unusual at all - Ryo hooks one arm with Sion’s and his other with Riku’s and he pulls them both in closer. “Thank you, hyung,” he sighs. And then, in Japanese: “You know, you guys act so much like my mom and my dad.”


Ryo says it so simply yet it’s still just a little- Riku doesn’t know how to take that. He doesn’t know how to take that and he’s already a little in his feels as it is, so when his eyes accidentally meet Sion’s, Riku blushes without really meaning to. But his hyung’s smile is the same as it always is; teasing, fond, a little smug. “Really?” Sion even grins. “Even though we’re both alphas? Who’s the mom and who’s the dad?”


“You’re the dad,” Ryo says very plainly, of course. “And Riku-nii’s the mom.”


God, it must be nice to be a pup who can so shamelessly say these types of things to their two oldest pack members. Riku feels a little aghast but Sion just laughs like what he said is funny and nonsensical and ridiculous. “Ah, then that makes me and Riku husband and wife…” Sion then looks over at him. “Riku, do you wanna be my wife?”


It takes Riku a whole second to process just what Sion said because that, too, is supposed to be funny and nonsensical and ridiculous. But then the words register and Riku’s going bright red and stuttering. “Wh- what?” There’s no need for him to sound so surprised, either, but he’s always been terrible at playing subtle whenever Sion really teases him. 


But Sion hyung is still grinning and now Ryo is, too: “I’m asking if you’d like to be my wife, Riku-kun.”


And, well. Well, okay, Riku should’ve seen that one coming. He hates that he reacts so strongly to these kinds of things because that’s just who Sion is, you know, teasing and fond and a little smug. But he’s also deadly handsome and suspiciously kind and very, very doting and Riku finds it all really- it’s just intimidating to be met with Sion’s affection full-force, to be on more even-footing with him than the others are, to have to act nonchalant out of fear of what it would mean if Sion treated him specially. But he doesn’t, obviously, because they’re both alphas and the group is- obviously they’re just- and they would never-


Riku’s eyes quickly avert down to the ground and he tries not to squirm as two sets of eyes stare at him. “I-” He doesn’t know what to say. Sion’s just joking but Riku secretly wishes he wasn’t, that’s the awful thing. “Hyung, that’s-”


“Ah, well, it’s- I’m just teasing. You don’t have to go along with everything I say, you know.” Of course Sion backpedals once Riku really gets skittish. He always does that, too, backing off quickly and changing the subject like nothing ever happened at all. “Ryo-chan’s just being silly anyway, right?”


In the corner of Riku’s eye he can see Ryo give their leader a strange look, but at Sion’s insistence he relents. “Uh, yeah,” Ryo says. “‘Cause obviously you’re both alphas, so…”


The reminder stings. The reminder always stings. It’s already hard for Riku to adjust to his designation but Sion makes it more complicated, the pups make it more complicated, sometimes he just wishes he were unaffected by it all or at least better-suited to being an alpha. For a very long second Riku simmers in his resentment but then he remembers where he is and who he’s talking to and how for the rest of his life he will very publicly be an idol alpha. For the rest of his life, he has to- he has to be what people want him to be. He just does, and he doesn’t have a choice, and he’s always known that.


That’s the thing, right? Riku knows his fate. So he just… he inhales. And then he exhales. And then he smiles something small, something tired, something real enough. Right, he has a role to play. And Maeda Riku can play a goddamn role, can’t he?


“No, it’s okay,” Riku still avoids Sion’s eyes but pulls Ryo in a little closer like none of this bothers him at all. “I can be your mom, Ryo-chan.” And he’s gonna leave the implications of that unspoken, too, because never in a million years is anyone allowed to know just how much he’d like to be Sion hyung’s wife.


“Good,” Ryo smiles back. And Sion’s eyes, his gaze still as unrelenting as it always is, burn into the side of Riku’s head. But he ignores that because he always ignores it and he might die if he were to ever be honest with anyone about what those eyes really do to him.


As long as he acts unaffected everything will be just fine, right? It’s not like Sion hyung would ever like him back anyway. So surely he’ll be alright as long as he keeps his feelings a secret…


After that, it doesn’t take long for them to reach the company garage and pile into the van and take the long drive home in the midst of rush-hour traffic. One of the manager hyungs drives them to the usual chicken place and Sion sits in the passenger seat, talking idly about schedules and meetings and the like because he’s just, like, the best leader ever. And sure, Riku really should stop spending so much of his time staring at Sion in wonder and thinking about him like this even though at this point it’s just become a habit. But he still just- he needs to learn how to be subtle! It’s for his own sake!


So, in turn, Riku tries to not pointedly ogle at his leader’s side profile - and also pointedly fails - but it isn’t like there’s much else to do anyway. He’s sandwiched between the maknaes in the second seat and Yushi and Daeyoung are both passed out in the third row and Sakuya is bending over Riku’s lap to show Ryo a TikTok. Everyone’s so calm, too, now that their frantic energy has dissipated with distance from the company building. City lights illuminate the car a subdued yellow and from here he can see the outline of Sion’s handsome face as he leans over the center console…


Riku goes a little pink but that’s because he really can’t help himself, can he? Oh Sion is just so handsome that it’s impossible to not stare at him, so.


Their manager and their leader go over a bunch of work stuff and Ryo and Sakuya argue over a video trend they want to try out and Daeyoung is snoring in the backseat while there’s the tinny sound of EXO playing out of Yushi’s airpods. Riku zones out amongst the chatter around him, just kind of dazedly staring at the jut of Sion’s nose like a man obsessed. Really, that’s why it takes him so long to realize he’s being spoken to, but then Sion turns in his seat to give him a look. 


“Riku?” Their leader asks. “Are you awake? Did you hear me?”


And, well. Riku is barely awake, actually, but he still snaps out of his daze and straightens in his seat. “S-sorry, hyung. I was zoning out a little bit…”


“No, it’s okay,” Sion smiles something reassuring over his shoulder. “Just gimme your order so I can run in and get dinner, alright?”


Okay, maybe Riku is deeply whipped on many levels, but it’s still crazy to him how good and doting and wonderful his Sion hyung is about, like, everything. But that’s also maybe just his delusion talking. “I’ll- I’ll have the usual,” Riku pinkens in response. He’s extra embarrassed by how easily his thoughts run off the rails whenever Sion looks at him but really, he’s a little insane and that’s something he’s always known too.


“Alright,” Sion turns back to the front. “Then I don’t wanna hear complaining from anyone, okay?”


Well, at least there’s that stern alpha tone again. The babies chorus back their agreement and Riku belatedly echoes them and soon after that they’re pulling up to the typical chicken spot, wherein Sion and their manager get out to go get the food. Riku’s head lolls to his shoulder and he threatens to drift off again almost instantly, too. Sometimes Sion’s presence wakes him right up but his hyung’s espresso scent is still lingering in the car and just the familiar smell of Riku’s favorite alpha is enough to make him feel all subdued again. He’s just… god, today was so long and he’s just so fucking tired…


“Nii-chan,” Sakuya says when Riku’s head tilts onto him next, “just go to sleep. Seriously.”


“M’kay,” Riku mumbles, too tired to argue back. And so he does.


It’s funny, existing in that space between sleep and awakeness when the drive is so smooth and the car is full of the scents of his pack and even the chatter is so quiet; Riku doesn’t really remember the exact moment he falls asleep but when he’s awoken again, it’s because there’s a hand shaking his knee. “Riku.” It squeezes next and it’s shameful how even half-asleep he knows the hand is Sion’s.


“Wh…?” Riku yawns awake, still too sleepy to really register much at all. But then the car sounds suspiciously quiet and it feels suspiciously empty and he’s suddenly blinking around and realizing that no one’s here with him besides Sion. What in the… 


They’re already back at the dorm and everything? Where the hell is everyone else?


“Sorry,” his hyung says. “The kids wanted to wake you and I felt bad ‘cause you’ve been so tired recently. But you need to eat, too, so we should get going...”


Sion sounds pretty nonchalant but all of this is kind of weird, isn’t it? As in, Sion leaning in the backseat to squeeze his knee and Sion waiting around for him and Sion telling the others to let Riku rest when normally none of them have any qualms about bothering each other. But Sion hyung was what, just sitting here all this time? He hasn’t even eaten yet?


God, that’s- that’s so embarrassing. Riku goes red and suddenly feels very, very awake.


“Oh, I…” He doesn’t even know what the hell to say because maybe Riku should’ve expected Sion to do this when that’s just the kind of hyung he is, god, but it’s still not fair because alphas aren’t supposed to be so kind and lovely and doting. Riku can’t even meet his eyes, either. “You didn’t have to do that, hyung…”


Even after being in this country for almost two years the word hyung is still a little foreign on the tongue; Riku almost stumbles over it. But Sion is still smiling and his hand is warm and it feels like his palm could burn a hole through Riku’s jeans and this is all just- it’s insane. It’s insane how good he is, really.


“It’s okay,” Sion says. “But it’s getting late and I’m sure you’re hungry, right?”


Riku had actually forgotten about dinner completely, but it’s true that his stomach has been growling for a while now. And at least food would save him from all of this fucking embarrassment, right? “Y-yeah,” Riku unbuckles his seatbelt as Sion takes his hand back and he almost laments the loss like an idiot. “And you need to eat, too. So…”


He almost stumbles over his words again, but even when Sion steps out of the car he’s still smiling. “Don’t worry, I will.” And then he even beckons Riku over to his side, who of course obeys without any second thought. “Ready to go?”


“Yeah.” Riku falls into step with him and this still feels so embarrassing, god, but it’s also not really anything unusual for the two of them. Sion’s always been very giving even though most alphas aren’t and Riku has always been allowed to take whatever Sion offers him even though most alphas wouldn’t and that’s just how their relationship works. It’s easy to pretend that he doesn’t have a crush; it’s easy to blame his weirdness on his exhaustion; it’s easy to listen to everything Sion says because he’s the leader and not because Riku, like, wants to submit to him. They’re groupmates and fellow alphas and roommates and everything is- it’s fine. 


Right? Right, exactly.


There’s nothing uncomfortable about them heading inside and taking the elevator up to the apartment, at least, and as usual Sion doesn’t make him talk at all. Riku’s usually the more talkative one when it’s just the two of them, actually, but in time since they’ve transitioned from idol hopefuls to the edge of debut it’s gotten more intimidating to talk to Sion one-on-one. Now he’s not just a hyung but a leader; now he’s Riku’s leader. These days Sion seems so infallible and firm and always, always dependable and it’s hard to not be nervous about the many ways in which his pack alpha, even in these mundane moments, feels larger than life. It used to be very easy to needle at him with endless questions but now Riku’s so nervous to say the wrong things or make the wrong moves in fear of Sion realizing just how desperate he wants to get closer to him…


But that’ll improve with time, hopefully. Er, maybe. And Sion only touches him once, a hand on Riku’s elbow, stepping to the side to let him off first. It’s such a stereotypical alpha mannerism that it hurts. “Careful,” Sion even says.


Riku flushes. He could say so many things right now, things like you don’t need to do that, actually, or I’m also an alpha, you know, or I’m not one of the pups, I don’t need your help. But he doesn’t; of course he doesn’t. Riku just bows his head and lets Sion hold him and mumbles back: “Okay.”


Sion lets go as they make their way to the apartment door and that’s a bit of a loss but it’s fine, obviously, because Riku’s not gonna complain. Then Sion beeps in the doorcode and they both step inside, shedding their shoes in the hyeongwan as sounds of the pups chattering away echo out from the kitchen. Sion only smiles at the laughs coming from the others, heading right off to join them, and Riku wordlessly trails after him. 


Riku isn’t staring this time, but Sion only looks back once. “You’re not too sleepy, right? You don’t need hyung to carry you?” He’s joking, of course, but sometimes Sion says things that don’t sound like jokes at all.


“I’m good,” Riku sighs back. Really, he should be used to this kind of thing by now, the teasing and the jokes and everything. And yet he’s still… ugh, he’s hopeless. Riku’s just fucking lovesick, isn’t he? He’s lovesick and obsessed and there is no cure for this, his Oh Sion obsession. 


But he- that’s fine. It’s fine because he’s dealing with it. 


Back in the kitchen is the familiar mess of four teenage boys chowing down on boxes of chicken while teasing each other in a mix of languages, though it’s mostly just Yushi making an indignant little face while Sakuya and Ryo gang up on him. There are two seats left and so Sion and Riku sit down between the maknaes who are bickering, again, as they always do. For a second Riku’s overwhelmed by the sounds and the pup-smells of his pack, but then Sion’s taking his plate and loading it up for him. 


“You have to eat,” his hyung chides a little, though he always chides at all of them. “Riku, you barely ate lunch, right?”


“Um. I guess I didn’t eat a lot…” Riku feels a little shy from the doting but that’s because it’s very alpha of Sion to do this, too, except alphas don’t usually do this for other alphas - that’s why Riku sometimes can’t tell if Sion takes his role as leader too literally or if he just doesn’t see them on equal footing because he’s always performing these weirdly loaded gestures. But soon a plate of chicken is set down in front of him and Sion nudges him in the side and none of this is even worth pondering on since his hyung’s just gonna be relentless about these things anyway. 


“Eat,” Sion presses. And then a hand settles behind Riku, on the ledge of his chair, before four fingers press into his back. “And I’m your pack alpha so you have to listen to me, okay?”


Sion says it like Riku has disobeyed him even once, which is funny, because of course he hasn’t. But then that hand is trailing up his spine and squeezing over his nape the same as Sion does to all the pups, and that’s- it’s fine, too, except Riku isn’t a pup and now Sion’s scenting him. Which is- that’s also just a little-


“I’m an alpha too,” Riku murmurs as he takes a bite. But he barely believes himself even as he says it and maybe Sion doesn’t either because a wrist rubs over his nape and he’s scented thoroughly in the same way any pack alpha would scent their packmates. Really, it’s a perfectly innocent gesture and yet Riku wants to melt into his hyung and purr at him and scent him right back. 


“Well I know you’re perfectly capable,” Sion says in his usual level voice, only squeezing once more before pulling away to serve himself dinner. “But I can take care of you too, can’t I? Even though you’re an alpha you’ll let your hyung take care of you, right?”


But what does… what does that even mean? Riku’s thoughts are distant but this isn’t the first time he’s had to question all of this, either. Does it mean what I want it to mean? There’s no way it does. And he doesn’t say any of that, of course, because he just can’t. But Sion’s so good and this is how their relationship works, Sion being good to him and Riku desperately trying to hide the fact that he has a crush despite them both being groupmates and roommates and fellow alphas. This is just how things are, right? Riku is greedy and selfish and he wants more than Sion could give him and he just has to live with that.  


“You can just- um.” Riku avoids Sion’s eyes but that’s because he’s ashamed, kind of, and yet his hyung’s still smiling in his peripheral. “Well, you can- you can do what you want. You’re the leader, so.” And his words are a cop-out, really, because it’s his fault for being way too obedient to Sion’s every command as it is. But his hyung’s smile grows and very briefly a hand rests on Riku’s shoulder like it belongs there. 


“Good,” Sion says in a low voice. “So your alpha’s gonna take care of you, okay?”


God. It’s just not fair that Riku would roll onto his back belly-up and submit if Sion only asked him to. But he only picks at his food some more as his ears turn red and his heart pounds, pounds, pounds: “That’s- okay. Sure, hyung.”


Dinner is mildly chaotic though still less chaotic than it would be had they not been at work since eight in the morning; Yushi’s still a little iffy with the maknaes and Daeyoung’s still a little skittish and yet the four younger members still get into their usual nonsense and Riku’s content to just sit here and nibble at his food while taking in the fondness of their pack. Really, they’re all cute. Even the squabbling has grown on him even though it sometimes also feels like it’s never going to end…


“Go take a shower, I’ll clean everything up,” Sion tells him when they’re done eating and he’s wrangled the little ones into helping with the dishes. He doesn’t touch Riku again but he’s a little firmer than usual: “Okay? You can rest up.”


“I- okay,” Riku says automatically, which is very not-alpha of him but an impulse Sion just drags out of him regardless. There are two showers in the dorm so he could wait a little, too, but if Sion’s really insisting then he has no choice but to listen…


Sion pats him on the arm and his voice is still firm, still alpha-like, still the embodiment of a leader: “Good. So go while I’m letting you off the hook.” It’s not a question this time - Sion isn’t usually this firm with him, either, but when Riku’s sleepy and dazed sometimes he takes on this tone that makes it just feel easier to do exactly what he’s told.


“R-right,” Riku stutters when Sion sends him a very pointed look. And so, listening to his pack alpha like he always does, he takes off.


This part of the routine is familiar and Riku’s too exhausted on his feet to think much as he washes off in the shower, as he scrubs his hair, as he slumps through the process of bathing-drying-getting dressed. There’s never anything poignant to reflect on on days like these, either, so there’s no point in trying. Recently work has been pretty damn stressful and Riku’s trying not to dwell over his mess-ups during practice or his stumbles in Korean in the recording studio, but they’ve still got over half a year until their debut and things are… they’re difficult but they’re fine, at least, which Riku is grateful for. He’ll survive. He’s committed to this dream, playing alpha or not, and so he has no choice but to keep trudging on…


Riku finishes putting on his pajamas and then brushes his teeth while slow-blinking at himself in the mirror, desperately trying to stay awake and keep steady on his feet all the while. Recently his mind has been racing and he’s been extra on-edge about the alpha of it all as they get closer to the Hands Up release, but in the calm and the quiet he’s trying not to dwell on any of that either. It’s okay as long as Sion doesn’t mind things as they are, right, picking up his slack as a fellow hyung? Riku is one of the eldest members and an alpha at that but he has no desire to scold the pups or be in charge or play a role as protector, aggregator, or even be growly at all. It’s hard not to be insecure about that, too, but at the same time he has no choice but to try his best even though it feels like he’s lying to himself most days. Which is- well, that just has to be fine on top of everything else when Riku has no fucking choice about anything, right?


A voice tickles in the back of his mind, a familiar one. Wouldn’t it just be easier if you presented as an omega? Wouldn’t it be easier if you didn’t have to hide? Wouldn’t it be easier if you were someone Sion hyung could be interested in? All of those thoughts are useless to be thinking but Riku feels inclined to agree, of course, because it’s just true. Deep down he wants to be an omega more than anything and even then Sion could… then it’d be possible for him to like him back, right? It wouldn’t be such a pipedream, would it?


For a second Riku stares at his reflection and feels a deep, dire kind of sadness that he usually prefers ignoring. He can stew all he wants and sometimes he does when it’s just him because it makes him really sad, actually, that his biology’s so cruel to him. But again, thinking these things is useless when he’s an alpha and that’s never going to change…


“Ugh,” Riku casts his eyes down to the ground and wipes at his face. “Let’s not think about it.”


He opts not to dwell even though he really wants to; Riku instead goes back to his room and lays down in bed, his usual Kuromi sweat towel already waiting on standby. It’s still too early to go to sleep but he’s a little tempted when today was so long and chaotic and stressful. They finally had a dress rehearsal of their NCT Nation stage and the outfits took some getting used to dancing in. But these are the things we still have time to adjust to, Sion has been telling them, so don’t worry and just practice. And yet half the group got scolded by management for slacking so it’s just hard not to feel down about all of that on top of all the other stuff he has to feel down about.


But really, god, Riku shouldn’t be thinking about that either! He isn’t an anxious person by nature but he’s currently on the cusp of getting into one of the most anxiety-inducing jobs in the world and it’s just- wow, all of this is just a lot.


Seriously, he needs to chill - and Riku usually prides himself in that, actually, being chill - so he refuses to think about anything and lays there and stares up at the ceiling. It’s easier to relax like this, too, because Riku could scroll on his phone or watch videos or do literally anything but he’s just too tired for any of it. So he keeps his mind blank and inhales the familiar scents of his room, stares at the familiar shapes of their furniture, listens to the familiar sounds of the dorm... 


Sakuya and Ryo are causing a ruckus next door and there’s Daeyoung singing in the shower, too, and Yushi moves as quietly as a mouse so he’s impossible to locate. But then there’s a heavy pair of footsteps approaching the door and Riku tenses on instinct. Really, those footsteps could only belong to-


“You asleep?” Sion pokes his head inside the door like this isn’t his own room he’s allowed to enter and exit as much as he pleases. But then he sees that Riku’s still awake and smiles. “I thought you’d be knocked out by now.”


“No, I’m not…” Riku yawns a little, which doesn’t help anything, but still. “I’m not that tired yet, hyung.”


“I see.” Sion must’ve showered because the ends of his hair are wet and there are a few water droplet marks on the shoulders of his t-shirt. But even like this he’s as handsome as ever, crossing the room to get to his own bed in two long strides because wow, his legs are still so unbelievably long. “So you’re gonna be up for a bit, Riku, hm?”


As usual Sion comes off as pretty easy-going, and also as usual, Riku can’t stop staring as his hyung starts rummaging through his bag. “I dunno,” Riku says as he watches Sion blink, as he watches the flutter of his lashes against his cheek, as he watches the plump fat of his bottom lip jut out as he searches for his phone charger. They usually keep the lights pretty low in here so the shadows only highlight the very handsome slopes of Sion’s features…


Riku finally blinks out of his daze when Sion turns to look at him and somehow he isn’t even embarrassed this time because there’s a furrow to Sion’s eyebrows that isn’t usually there. “You- you don’t think you’re going to sleep soon?” And, well, so much for being easy-going. Suddenly Sion sounds nervous, too, and that’s just kind of strange. 


For a second Riku just stares at him. While he wouldn’t say Oh Sion is really the calmest person in the world, he’s an awfully self-assured and reliable kind of guy and that makes even the worst of his neurosis seem like mere personality quirks. But there’s a lilt to Sion’s voice that’s almost embarrassed and all of this is strange enough that Riku finally meets his eyes, looking across the very small space between their two twin beds. But sometimes that two feet of separation feels like a chasm, really, and this is one of those times - Sion stares back at him and even now he’s disturbingly beautiful.


“I don’t think so,” Riku says very slowly. And then he blinks again. “Why?”


That finally gets Sion to move, who sets his bag aside and sits down at the edge of his mattress and wrings his hands in his lap. That isn’t unusual - he’s twitchy as hell, like, all the time - but now his smile seems nervous, too. “Well, um. I... I was hoping to unwind a bit and so I was wondering if you wanted to…” Then he trails off and his smiles strains. It’s rare that Sion’s bad with his words but for a long, long moment he says nothing.


Riku is very confused now. “You were wondering if I… if I what, hyung?” And he waits, too, dying to know what the hell this weirdo is trying to say to him. 


Normally they communicate better than this as roommates, though admittedly that’s usually because Sion has little issue with saying whatever he needs to. But now there’s a very stilted line to his shoulders and his hands are even more antsy than usual and there’s another long pause before Sion inhales; then Sion exhales; then Sion seemingly makes up his mind.


“I was... I’m kind of pent up. So I wanted to watch porn and jerk off. And so, um. You know, um, that’s-” Sion then licks his lips. “If that’s fine with you, I’m gonna- yeah.”


His request comes from so out of the blue that it takes another moment for Riku to process this. But then he blinks, realizes what’s being asked of him, and goes pink. “Oh, so you-” Then Riku looks away and his mind echoes the words Sion hyung and porn and jerking off and SION HYUNG WATCHING PORN AND JERKING OFF? And then Riku stares down at his hands, too. “I- I see. Well, that’s- if you want to, then you should.” 


Wow. This is- wow. Riku tries not to think of the image of Sion doing all of this in his head, either, but that’s a lost fucking cause. They’ve been sharing a room for months and Riku’s never caught Sion doing anything strange but he knows what his leader looks like when he’s laid back in bed and watching videos on his phone and it must be something similar. But his dick would be out and he’d be touching it and- god, wait, Riku’s never even thought about Sion’s dick before but now he kind of needs to see it. 


It’s- it’s probably big, right? Like, it just has to be.


Riku tries to act like his thoughts are pure as Sion blinks back at him and his thoughts are pure, kind of, as in this is mostly stemming from pure curiosity. Mostly. And the offer shouldn’t even feel like this big of a deal when it isn’t anything unusual between groupmates, or at least it wasn’t back when they were trainees - the alphas would often do whatever they pleased in the dorms, usually fully shameless about jerking off whenever they wanted or willing to watch porn together in a group. But Sion hasn’t- with Riku, he’s never- well, neither of them have ever mentioned their dicks at all. So.


“Then… um. If you wanna stay, you can stay…” Sion is still a little twitchy but his voice lowers. “We could- you know.” So he must be thinking about it, too, how things were when they were trainees. Which means this is… so it’s an invitation, too? Holy shit.


Riku isn’t an idiot so he isn’t going to ask you really wanna watch porn and jerk off with me, hyung? but he’s thinking it. He’s thinking it really, really hard. Sometimes Riku can’t help but wonder if Sion sees him as a prude, you know, because usually alphas have little to no boundaries with each other when it comes to sex and getting themselves off and Sion has never even breathed a mention of sex in his direction. But this is an opportunity he’d be stupid not to take, and so Riku nods because he’s doomed either way. 


Either he sees Sion’s dick or he goes back to the living room and spends the next hour of his life trying not to think about Sion’s dick, so he really should just give into temptation like he wants to. “Sure,” Riku says. “I could- I could let off steam, too...”


He doesn’t even think he sounds nonchalant or anything but for a second Sion looks surprised by his answer - seriously, does he really think Riku’s some kind of holier-than-thou alpha? - but then something in his hyung’s face melts back into its typical easy-going Leader Expression. And then Sion even smiles: “Alright, then. Then let’s…” His hands twist in his lap again. “Why not?”


It’s funny because this is something that’s usually very typical between alpha roommates and yet Sion and Riku absolutely do not have the kind of relationship where they talk about sex or their dicks or even their knots, really, because they hardly even mention their ruts after the fact. So this is all very… well, it’s a little curious. Sion always takes his role as hyung deadly seriously, sure, but Riku’s seen him talk to the guys from Riize and he always treats them the same way most alphas treat other alphas - brash, you know, rambunctious and teasing. But with Riku he’s always so kind and dependable and soft, which is…


Well, now Riku wishes Sion treated him like that too. He wants to be more than a dongsaeng and he wants to be someone Sion is close with like he’s close to other alphas and he wants to take this opportunity to see what Oh Sion’s really packing. But, like, you know. It’s his dick that Riku’s dying for most of all, so.


After a second of both of them just kind of looking at each other, Sion seems to have realized that they’re actually about to do this because then he pats down on his bed. “Then- then c’mere. This way we can both watch together, yeah?” And then he unpockets his phone, too, as if that little evil thing isn’t about to change Riku’s entire goddamn life. 


Wow. Wow, so they’re really gonna jerk off to porn together just like this? Riku goes red. “Okay, yeah…” His mouth also feels dry and a part of him is immediately regretting this and every nerve ending in his body is screaming at him to run away from Sion hyung’s whole sexy deal, too. But alas, Riku stands up from his bed and listens.


Really, he dug this grave himself, right? So this is either about to be the best or worst decision he’s ever made in his life. And it’s- this is all fine.


Riku crosses over to Sion’s bed and that itself isn’t a big deal, either, because he’s sat on Sion’s bed plenty of times before. But it feels different now that they’re about to do something insane and it smells more strongly of espresso on this side of the room and Riku crosses his legs and rests his hands in his lap in lack of anything better to do as Sion very casually switches to an incognito browser on his phone and literally types the word porn into the search bar. Does he- what, does he not have a dedicated site? All the alphas back in the trainee dorms did, almost to the point that Riku wondered if being unbearably horny was part of being an alpha on the biological level.


But Sion seems surprisingly calm as he then searches “omega x alpha” into some random porn website and Riku tries not to stare too hard, either, as he watches his hyung scroll thumbnails for a while before landing on a video of an alpha male and omega male. Which is- well, okay. That’s a very specific kind of dynamic, isn’t it? Sion’s said before that he doesn’t care much for gender preferences but it’s still just…


Well, it doesn’t matter. And Riku doesn’t even realize just how close they’re sitting together until Sion turns to him and asks: “How’s this one look?” He’s close enough that Riku can see all his moles even in the low light of their bedroom and that is- god, Sion hyung is really so beautiful. Wow.


“Um. Yeah, this is fine...” Riku glances down at the phone in his hyung’s hand and feels something in his stomach twist as Sion presses on his selected video and there instantly comes the loud moans of an omega getting fucked, but they’re already this deep into doing something very stupid and there’s no way in hell he’s backing out now. The porn is very straightforward, too, the omega made to take it from the back as the alpha slowly fucks into him, and so it doesn’t seem like they’re gonna watch anything all that crazy anyway. Riku has never sat down and taken the time to ask himself if he thought Oh Sion was a vanilla kind of alpha, but now he can’t help but get a little curious.


Is Sion really the type of guy to get turned on by the most standard doggy-style in the world? Apparently he is. That’s both surprising and a little disappointing and Riku is going to keep his self-respect intact by not reflecting on why he feels that way, either.


At least the video is fine. It’s a little boring but definitely fine - both of the actors are attractive, the moaning isn’t too annoying, the sex looks hot enough. Admittedly Riku isn’t really turned on by any of this but Sion props his phone up against his nightstand at an angle so they can both still see and then his right hand palms over his crotch and that’s- well, that’s way hotter than watching these two guys go at it. Riku tries to stare at the video instead of his hyung, but every now and again his eyes just kinda naturally drift to the growing bulge in Sion’s sweats…



“Are you just gonna watch? You’re not gonna- you’re not gonna touch yourself?” Sion doesn’t look at him but Riku’s still a little surprised by how gruff his voice is because neither of them have spoken in a minute or two, really, and also he never thought he’d ever hear the words touch yourself come out of Oh Sion’s mouth. But then Riku realizes he’s been sitting here with his legs still crossed and that’s just a little embarrassing, isn’t it? Riku knows he doesn’t have many alpha mannerisms but he should still at least act like this kind of thing is sexy to him.


So:


“R-right,” Riku says. He spreads his thighs into a respectable alpha manspread and then squeezes kind of lazily at his own dick, which is earnestly half-interested at most. But then Sion fully turns back to the video and he’s rubbing his cock and his jaw looks so strong and his palm is so huge and there’s a vein running up the length of his forearm and it’s all just very- god, really, has Sion hyung always been so sexy?


Riku can feel his dick twitch, once, and it slowly grows to life as he squeezes at it again. He turns back to the video but it’s so much easier to get a horny when he attributes all the alphaisms of the guy in the video to his very own leader - Sion isn’t really buff or anything but his shoulders are wide and he’s deceptively strong for how skinny he is and just like that alpha in the video, he could probably make those same low sounds. Oh, fuck, is Sion the vocal kind? He wouldn’t be, right? But wouldn’t it be so hot if he was?


Riku is both disturbed and turned-on by the thought but it’s true, isn’t it, his hyung could fuck just like that guy in this video can. His eyes glaze over a little bit as he stares at Sion’s phone screen but that’s because he knows where his mind wants to travel to and it feels like an awful idea to let it. But if he stares hard enough it’s like that alpha in the video is Sion and that omega is- that omega could be-


“God.” Sion interrupts his barrage of thoughts with a tiny grunting sound and that’s great, actually, because Riku’s thoughts were about to go somewhere he usually refuses to let them. But then he looks at Sion and immediately goes regrets doing that because Sion’s growing in his fucking hand, because he’s so rough and mean with himself, because his expression is a little pained and he looks so, so, so fucking turned-on. Sion pants a little. “It’s- sorry, Riku. I guess I’m more pent up than I thought...”


Riku doesn’t know what to say because he gets fully hard, too, just from the sight of Sion pulling his pants down under his hips and freeing his cock and he’s huge, what the fuck. Riku expected it, but still, it’s insane. Is that what all alphas are supposed to look like? A cock like that is basically something out of porn and Riku doesn’t need to look down at his own dick to know in comparison he’s a little smaller and somehow that thought is less humiliating than it is just really fucking sexy. 


So Sion hyung dwarfs him even here, does he? God, that’s- fuck. Fuck.


“It’s fine,” Riku whispers. If he speaks any louder he might moan like an idiot, and so he also frees his dick from his boxers and tries not to pass out when Sion glances over at him. His eyes are as intense as they always are and Riku goes red just from the gaze alone and he speaks without even thinking: “Wow, it- it feels good, hyung, right?”


It’s hard to think coherently when the guy you’re kind-of in love with is looking at you like that, but still, maybe Riku shouldn’t have said that because Sion very abruptly turns away and hisses and rubs meanly just under the head of his cock. “It does,” his voice is low. And then the alpha in the video picks up his speed and Sion hisses again.


This is bad. Like, this is really bad. Riku’s having a hard time focusing on anything when Sion’s cock is close enough for him to touch and it’s big and it’s girthy and of all things it’s also, like, beautiful-looking. Is that weird to say? It is but it’s still true. Sion’s dick is so pretty and Riku kind of wants to suck on it and that’s not something he didn’t know about himself, sure, but it’s still shameful.


How is it even possible, really, that Sion hyung is beautiful all over? Riku feels this very pressing urge to whine about it. It’s just- it just isn’t fair.


“Jesus,” Sion keeps murmuring to himself as he stares the video down. Riku licks his lips and can’t look away from his hyung’s hand jerking himself off as the alpha on the video groans something about a knot and the omega cries back in response. Fuck, what would Sion’s knot look like? It’d be huge, right? How would it look in his hand?


Riku can feel it again, a rising whine. He bites it back but it keeps building in his throat, and the urge just keeps persisting, and then there’s also the urge to reach over to his hyung and offer his mouth or his hand or even his- hell, he’d be willing to lend his-


“Fuck,” Sion mumbles another low sound and Riku has to swallow down his groan in response. But Sion must be close, right? He’s getting rougher, he’s fucking his fist in time with the alpha in the video, then the omega literally wails and he just grunts. “I-” Then Sion hisses again.


Riku can’t say anything. Or, well, he shouldn’t. But Sion’s wet at his tip and his dick is oddly pretty and his hand is so big and he’s so- of course Sion’s sexy, it’s a given, but now Riku knows for a fact that every single inch of Oh Sion is the most attractive anyone has ever been. “Are you close, hyung?” Riku really shouldn’t be talking but he doesn’t regret it, either, because then Sion’s fist speeds up. Holy shit.


“I am,” his hyung says. “Are- are you?”


They aren’t looking at each other. Or at least Sion isn’t looking at him. But Riku jerks himself off and he wishes it was his leader touching him instead and so he breathes out: “Maybe…”


It’s hard to get close when Sion is right here and very much not touching him, but still, everything about Oh Sion is sexy and alpha and delicious. And it’s just- god, wouldn’t this be so much easier if Riku were an omega, too? He already knew he had some level of disdain towards his own secondary gender, but now more than ever he wishes he weren’t an alpha because then Sion could be turned on by him like he is by the omega in the video. But that’s- it’s just- the idea of Sion fucking an omega instead of him is-


“Hyung,” Riku tries not to whine but it still comes out anyway, a vaguely petulant tone. “Have you- have you ever fucked anyone before?”


Riku shouldn’t ask that either but his curiosity is burning and he wants to know if Sion is actually into this kind of thing, knotting an omega or whatever the hell most alphas like so much. Sion glances at him very briefly, but then he looks away when he sees that Riku’s already staring. “I- I have,” he grunts out. “Once, there was an omega trainee who- he left, but-”


Okay, admittedly Riku really doesn’t want to hear anything about Sion having sex with someone who isn’t him - let alone an omega at that - and yet this is another grave he dug himself. “Really?” Riku even tries to keep the bitterness out of his voice and fails. “And you- you liked it?”


Again, he’s asking questions he doesn’t need to know the answer to. But Sion is squeezing down on his cock and he looks closer to the edge this time, god, he looks like fucking his fist feels good. “I did,” Sion says in an even lower voice. “It was-” Then he cuts himself off with a groan. “How about you, Riku?”


Riku really didn’t need to hear Sion saying his name in his horny voice but now he has and his mind spins with it, those two syllables in that low timbre. “I haven’t,” he breathes. “But I’d- does it feel good? To have sex with an omega…?”


Sion closes his eyes, of all things, even as the guy in the video pops his knot and the omega on-screen mewls through it all. “It does,” he says. Neither of them even looking at the porn anymore. “It- it feels really good, actually. But I think it’d be better if I was having sex with my- my mate.”


That’s surprising. “Really?” Riku never pegged Sion for the romantic type but he’s making it sound like that’s something he wants, romantic sex with the person he’s chosen to love. It’s a little crazy, actually. Or at least it makes Riku feel crazy because he’s never thought of Sion and mating in the same sentence before but now he wants hyung to be his mate, too. 


Is he insane? He must be, right? But really, wouldn’t Sion be the perfect mate?


“I think it’d be- I think it’d be better. It’d be better to be with someone you love, but it’s still good either way…” Sion is breathing even more heavily this time, which is funny, because they’re only just talking and his eyes are still closed even though on-screen they’re showing a whole bunch of shots of cum leaking out of the omega’s pussy. But then Sion groans a little and he says: “Riku, if you- if you ever-”


“What?” Riku asks. The fact that Sion said his name again makes him feel even more crazed. In that low voice it sounds so different. Riku. Ri-ku.


But then, maybe even worse:


“When you have sex, it should be with- it should be with someone you trust.” Sion’s breathing a little harder now but his eyes are still squeezed shut and his fist is so rough, what the fuck. And yet Sion still doesn’t relent because when does he ever: “So just- promise me it won’t be with just anyone. You have to- you have to be careful so you don’t-”


“I-” Riku’s confused why this has turned into a lecture but Sion’s always kind of like this, isn’t he, chiding at them and handing out advice no one asked for? But still, as always, Riku obeys without question. “Okay, hyung. I- I promise…” That comes out sounding like a whine too, god.


“Good,” Sion breathes in response. “Good, you’re always so-” Then he groans. “Are you close, Riku?”


“Um.” He’s not, but Riku kind of wishes he were. “Not really. But you can-”


He flinches a little when Sion suddenly opens his eyes and turns to look at him, but that’s because their gazes meet and the look in Sion’s eyes is pure hungry alpha. “Can I?” Sion asks like he needs the permission. And that’s even more insane, isn’t it, because that’s like-


“Y-yeah.” Riku turns back to the phone because he can’t look at Sion when he’s making a face like that. “Hyung, you should- you should come.” It’s less whiny that time but no less needy.


“God,” Sion breathes in response. It’s not even a demand on Riku’s part, nor is he really trying to be involved in Sion’s orgasm either way, but very abruptly his hyung turns back to the video - which is coming to an end, actually - and now he’s panting. “Yeah. I- I’m gonna-” Sion squeezes down on his cock. He’s gonna come just from that? He’s gonna come because Riku told him to? There’s no way, right?


“Hyung,” Riku breathes involuntarily. It’s whiny, still, and then Sion jolts a little. What the hell. “Hyung, you-”


“I- I’m so-” Sion then groans a loud, visceral sound. God, that’s so sexy. “Riku, really, I’m so-”


It’s then when Riku lets himself look back down at Sion’s dick and he wants to fucking salivate at his hyung squeezing himself tight, his cock in his fist, every impressive muscle in his body strained, strained, strained. “Hyung,” Riku breathes just at the sight; this time he really can’t help how needy it sounds.


Sion groans. “God, you- you’re so fucking-” He’s so mean with himself, too, fucking his fist and making all these ungodly delicious noises. “Riku, you’re-”


“Sion hyung,” Riku breathes again, though this time it’s more because he’s curious why his leader seems to be- is he reacting to him? “Hyung, you can- can you- please?” He’s not begging, not yet, but he really wants to.


Sion’s eyes meet his for a long, long second and then he moans: “Fuck, you’re so-” Riku almost wants to ask him what that means but then Sion covers his mouth with his wirst and groans again.


“Hyung?” Riku pants. “Hyung, please?” He’s dying with curiosity, he’s dying to see more, he’s dying to see his Sion hyung spill even if he’s not the reason why.


But then, of all things, that’s when Sion comes; he groans and he groans and his cock kicks in his fist and then he spills into his hand as he whines: “Riku, fuck.”


And that is- did that really just happen? Or, actually, what just happened?


This seems to be surprising to both of them, the timing of Sion’s orgasm, because he bucks hard into his fist like he isn’t prepared and releases. It’s a lot of cum, too, spilling over his fist and getting his fingers sticky and Riku, perhaps still disillusioned, wants to lick them clean. God, he really wants to lick them clean…


“Fuck,” Sion grunts as he fucks himself through it. “Fucking hell, Riku, I-” Then he groans again.


“Wow,” Riku mumbles again because he’s insane. And he can’t even keep his thoughts to himself, can he, though admittedly it’s hard not to be impressed when you watch an alpha with so much self control spill like he just can’t help himself. Especially since Sion spilled after he asked him to, that’s also insane…


But Sion’s orgasm doesn’t last that long, or at least not once the crest of it hits. “Holy shit.” There’s a slick sound as his hand falls to the side and he lets go of his cock and plops back down on the bed. Sion groans again, but this time it seems to be more from relief as he wipes his hand off on the sheets. “Fuck, I really needed that.”


Riku’s still stroking at his own dick, albeit a little distracted, and he literally can’t look away from where cum shines wet on Sion’s soft cock. He should stop, right? It’d be weird to keep going, like, for sure. But Sion closes his eyes and he can’t even see Riku staring at him and that’s just tempting when he can look so openly; Riku loves to stare at his hyung and like this he can stare all he wants. Against the sheets Sion’s handsome and Sion’s sexy and Sion’s just the most beautiful man ever. Wow. Riku squeezes his cock and almost whines again.


But then the video on the phone autoplays to a new one and there comes the sounds of two deep voices, which is new. Riku turns back to Sion’s phone just to take a peek but that decision is a bad one, actually, because- wait, those guys are-


“Holy fuck,” Riku says involuntarily. But that’s because these next porn actors aren’t alpha and omega - no, they’re both alphas.


He stares and Sion cracks an eye open to see what he’s looking at. But there’s no doubt what’s going on in the porn because both of the guys are buff and brawny in the way you can only be with an ungodly amount of testosterone, and one of them is laid flat out on his back while the other tells him to spread his legs with an alpha command. And that’s- holy shit, his hole is gaping. Riku’s mouth goes dry. He’s never seen an alpha gape like that. But then he- then that means the two of them are gonna-


This is bad. Riku whines a tiny, humiliated sound and grips at his cock hard enough to hurt. He’s suddenly so turned-on that he doesn’t even know what to do with himself and Sion looks over at him, then, with a surprised look on his face. “You- you’re into this stuff, Riku?”


Of course he clocked it - Riku is very much aware he isn’t a subtle person, thanks - but that’s humiliating to answer too. He glances at Sion’s face but his hyung seems nonplussed by all of this, looking very obviously at where Riku’s squeezing his own cock. It doesn’t help that he’s horny enough to leak now, keyed-up from watching two alphas position themselves into missionary of all things, but Sion still, still, still stares. Riku doesn’t know what to say and he doesn’t know what to do and he’s worried that if he speaks now he’ll be too honest and- and then Sion will know that he-


“Guess you love this kind of thing, huh,” Sion points out for the both of them. “You’re wet.”


Sion’s presence always makes embarrassing things even more fucking embarrassing when he runs his mouth, god, and it’s worse that he says it in a tone like he’s talking about the weather and not his bandmate getting turned on by bitching porn. But Riku sends his hyung another look and Sion’s sitting back up all of a sudden, and he’s- he’s gripping at his cock again. That’s insane, isn’t it? He really wants to go again? 


“Hyung?” Riku sounds incredulous, too, but that’s because he is. He wasn’t aware that his leader had the stamina of a beast but it takes so little for Sion’s cock to twitch back to life. What the fuck.


“I can go twice,” Sion says easily. And then he’s also looking back at the video: “But you know, I… I think it’s pretty hot too.”


Riku doesn’t know what to do with this information now that he has it and it’s making him feel insane that Sion is also, what, turned on by this? Alpha on alpha? Bitching? It seems like these guys are bitching if the bottom’s so loose like that. But Sion’s into it, too, almost immediately hard again. Holy shit. 


“I’ve never tried it but I always thought it’d be sexy,” Sion says like Riku asked, which he didn’t. “Don’t you think so? There are plenty of cute alphas out there. Fucking one would be-” He groans a little. “You would too, right?”


Again, Riku has no fucking idea what to say and he should definitely keep his mouth shut because he has no inclination to fuck an alpha but rather be the one getting fucked and Sion isn’t allowed to know that. He just isn’t. Sion absolutely can’t know, like- like, any of that. But then the alpha on-screen whines as he’s fucked into and Riku moans a tiny sound, a devastated one, one that is completely involuntary on every single level imaginable. And he’s looking at Sion now, like openly, and his hyung only grins something smug. Why is he smug?


“Wouldn’t it be hot, Riku? I heard alphas are way tighter, so it might be even better than having sex with an omega.” Sion’s talking in that same tone even as he jerks himself off and it’s only making Riku feel more and more deranged. But his hyung keeps going, still, still, still: “And they can stretch over time, you know, they can get used to it. And you don’t have to worry about pregnancy. And getting to knot someone that tight is probably-”


Riku makes another tiny sound. He’s just- this is just so- well, okay, maybe he can understand why an alpha like Sion would be into this kind of thing - most alphas are, deep down, really into each other - but he has no fucking idea why Sion’s saying all of this to him. Riku himself would probably do anything to be bitched by his most trusted hyung and pack leader and coworker and that’s humiliating, of course, and so maybe if he were smarter he’d be finding a way to disengage. Right, that’d be the smart thing to do because Sion shouldn’t be saying any of this to him since Riku’s, like, literally aching to at least get a hand on his cock.


But Riku’s also so hard he could die and he might actually die; there’s no way in hell he’s stopping now, is he? There’s just no fucking way. 


This is bad. This is so, so beyond bad. On-screen is the shocking visual of an alpha getting pounded into like an omega but Riku can’t even pretend like he’s looking at the video when Sion’s running his mouth while still jerking himself off, and it’s- it’s just fucking hypnotizing, that familiar palm wrapped around that giant cock and how sexy he is in general. “I think it’d be hot, too, to- to bitch someone,” Sion’s saying. “If you’re into them, you know? Because then you’re helping them become an omega and it’s kind of romantic to-”


Riku pants. And then he whines and he can’t help that, either, staring at Sion’s cock and jerking himself off harder. Sion hyung would bitch someone. Could that someone be me?


“It’d be cute to make an alpha take it,” Sion says. “And then I could have an alpha of my own, huh?”


God. God, what the fuck, it’s even worse that Sion doesn’t discriminate between secondary genders on top of everything else. Let that alpha be me, Riku almost begs. Hyung, please, I want you inside of me and I want you to own me and I want to be your mate and I wish I could give you pups and-


“Sometimes I don’t see all the hype about omegas, you know,” Sion’s tone lowers even more. “Alphas are cute, too. Especially when they’re like-” And then he laughs. “It’d be cute if it were you, too, Riku.”


And, well, his words come from so far out of left field that it takes Riku three whole seconds to really process what Sion just said. Or at least it takes him a moment to realize that it was said at him, you know, that Sion’s talking about him and not some other hypothetically cute alpha. But then it registers and Riku freezes shock-still as Sion’s hand eases off his cock and the damn thing literally bobs in the air. And Riku is- it takes him another second to finally glance up at his face. Sion’s already looking at him, too, his smile unchanging. 


Oh, so he saw him staring? And what, he thinks Riku’s cute? But there’s no way that he- he wouldn’t- Sion would never- god, really. What the hell did that mean?


“I- what?” Riku tries to play nonchalant but fails, of course, because he’s leaking. This can’t even be real, right? He must be dreaming or something.


But:


“Well, it’s not that you wanna fuck an alpha, is it,” Sion asks. He speaks in that same low voice, smiles that same smile, everything about him still Gentle Leader Oh Sion. “You wanna be the one getting bitched, right, Riku?”


Holy shit. For a long moment Riku is flabbergasted that he was caught so easily - how the hell is Sion just always able to tell what he’s thinking, that’s fucking terrifying - but then the full realization hits him, the fact that Sion knows, and he’s not sure if this is more humiliating or just straight-up life-ruining. Riku’s mouth is dry and he can feel all the blood in his body go cold. Sion figured out the secret he’s been dying to keep to himself as long as they’ve known each other, and that’s just so- that’s-


Sion knows he wants to be bitched. Sion knows that he’d rather take a knot up the ass than be an alpha. Sion fucking knows.


“I-” Riku’s leaking even more now that Sion’s looking, which is worse. He should be embarrassed and ashamed but Sion hyung is looking at him, like really looking at him, so Riku just squirms and he can’t stop squeezing himself. “I just-”


“I’m not judging,” Sion says with a smile, and he’s using the voice he always uses when he’s trying to soothe one of the pups. Then he scoots in closer, too, just a tiny little smidge, and he’s still fucking smiling. “It’s kinda cute, actually, Riku. I could see you enjoying that kind of thing…”


This is fucking insane; again, Riku isn’t sure if he’s even breathing. Sion’s hands settle back in his own lap and stroke lazily at his cock but he’s not looking at the video anymore - he’s looking right at Riku’s face. That smile has a smug edge to it and it’s awful being smiled at like that because now Sion knows why Riku’s leaking. Holy shit.


“I don’t- I don’t know what you mean by that…” Riku looks away. He’s red but Sion scoots in even closer and Riku still doesn’t back away. He wants Sion to touch him so badly that he wouldn’t dare to, either, he wouldn’t dare to move an inch.


“But you’re so obedient to other alphas, you know? You’re a good listener. I think you’d take it so well…” Sion’s voice is low, commanding and authoritative and a little teasing. “I always thought you were so good for an alpha, Riku, but you’d be such a good omega too.”


And, well, Riku doesn’t know what that means either. But he whines as he squeezes his cock and Sion just licks his lips as he watches him squirm. He looks hungry again. And that’s even worse, isn’t it, that Sion looks at him like that? “I-” Riku’s panting. “Hyung, I don’t-”


“Would you actually do it?” Sion’s voice is even lower this time, he’s looking Riku in the eyes and just his gaze alone is fiery. “Would you wanna be bitched? And turned into an omega?” Then he comes in closer, closer, closer, so close that Riku can feel his breath.


Riku squeezes his eyes shut. “Hyung, I- I don’t think I… I shouldn’t…”


God, he wishes Sion didn’t ask so plainly but he knows his answer very deep down. Of course he does. As a kid Riku always thought he’d be an omega and even with the stigma that came with male omegas he saw that fate as his destiny and he was even excited, of all things, to one day have an alpha of his own. But Riku’s real presentation was an awful, horrible mess and waking up from the haze of rut to a knot was maybe the worst thing to ever happen to him. Riku knows that he wants it more than he knows anything, doesn’t he? If I had the choice, I’d be an omega in a heartbeat. I want to be an omega more than anything else. I wanna be an omega more than I even want to be Sion’s.


“Riku,” Sion’s saying in a low voice. He doesn’t scoot in again but he’s still gentle, he’s still kind, he’s still his hyung. “It’s okay. You can tell me.” It doesn’t help that he’s so nice, either, because it makes Riku want to tell him everything - it’s just absurd that neither of them are even touching their cocks anymore despite the fact that they’re supposed to be jerking off instead of talking about their feelings and, like, gender dysphoria.


But still, it’s just Sion, right? Sion’s so good at comforting people and reassuring the members and being a nice alpha leader. And now Riku could- he could tell him. And he’s never gotten to tell anyone before. He doesn’t know if he should but if his hyung’s offering, maybe he could finally… well.


Riku should tell him. He should finally tell someone.


“I- I don’t know.” Riku is mumbling because the truth is long and complicated and really difficult to talk about on any sincere level. He feels small under Sion’s gaze, too, which is making it harder to speak. “I’m not really that much of an alpha, I guess. And I thought I was gonna be an omega anyway, so it’s…” He licks his lips. “I didn’t really ask to be this way, hyung.”


Sion’s gaze is so intense but he keeps staring right at Riku’s face. “And that’s okay. If you wanted to be an omega, then you’d be a good omega. A really good one. You’d be really-” But then Sion inhales something shaky. “You should follow your heart, Riku, you know? So if you really wanted to be bitched, then…”


He trails off. Of course he does. Sion’s usually so good at toeing the line whenever he has to and for a second Riku is disappointed Sion isn’t offering to knot him himself. But then Riku’s eyes meet Sion’s again and his hyung still isn’t wavering. Sion just sits back a little and smiles. He’s- he’s always so great, isn’t he?


“I…” Riku wants to tell him, is the thing. “I think I’d want to. Eventually, you know…” He can’t even say it, either. I want to get bitched, Sion hyung.


But again, Sion smiles. He rests a hand on Riku’s shoulder, too, and neither of them are even looking at their dicks anymore but Riku is still cognizant of the fact they have porn playing on in the background and he’s still hard. The alpha in the video is moaning like an omega and god, Riku wishes he could make those noises too…


“Well, you can do anything you want,” Sion’s tone is low but fond all the same. And then the hand on his shoulder squeezes. “So if you could, would you?”


And really, they both know the answer to that. Riku nods. “Yeah…”


It’s hard to tell what Sion’s really thinking when he pointedly has his Leader Face on, an easy smile and kind eyes. But Sion isn’t judging and he only squeezes him again and Riku, now feeling arguably the most vulnerable he’s felt in his life, tries not to cower. “Hm.” Sion hyung says. Then his hand roams over Riku’s nape and there, too, it squeezes. “See, I knew you’d make a good omega. You know you’re cute like this, right?”


Riku couldn’t possibly dare to meet Sion’s gaze but he squirms more; Sion says it like he thinks Riku’s cute but there’s no way that’s what he means. “I guess…” It doesn’t help that he’s still hard, god, and the more Sion works at his scent gland the more he leaks.


Sion hums again. Then his wrist swipes over Riku’s nape and espresso simmers with bergamot in the air and it’s fucking addicting because usually Sion isn’t this thorough when he scents him - usually it’s just a quick swipe against his neck or wrists rubbed together or something very brotherly and platonic and whatever the fuck else. But it feels purposeful this time. It feels like… doesn’t it feel like Sion isn’t just scenting him, but marking him?


Again, Sion’s close. He’s so close. He scoots in even closer and with their height difference his voice echoes in Riku’s bones. “Riku,” Sion says. “I don’t think there could be an omega better than you.”


God, that’s so- Riku has to fist his hands at his sides so he doesn’t do something deranged like touch himself over Sion speaking to him so plainly, at Sion praising him, at Sion letting him get this needy. “I don’t-” Riku’s eyes are firm on the ground but Sion’s close enough that Riku could lean into his chest if he wanted to. “But I’m not an omega…”


It’s just an impulse to say it no matter how much he wishes it weren’t true. But Sion’s wrist rubs at his scent gland and this is the most Riku’s ever smelled like him and this time it really, really feels claiming instead of brotherly. “Maybe not,” Sion smiles in his peripheral. “But we could make you an omega, yeah? If you wanted it?”


Fuck. Riku’s heart stutters in his chest and again he feels a little like he’s dreaming because Sion’s making it sound like- like he’s the one who wants to bitch him. Riku’s hands just shake in his lap and he very, very slowly lifts his head so their eyes meet. “Hyung, you…”


Sion’s gaze is unrelenting; he’s smiling; he’s still his hyung, his leader, his alpha. “Yes, Riku?” His voice is a coo, too, and that’s making him feel a little dizzy because he didn’t know Sion could speak to him like that. Holy shit.


“Could… could we?” Riku almost hates how hopeful he sounds but he is hopeful, is the thing, because if Sion’s offering there’s no way in hell he says no. He’s scared to reach out but Sion massages at his scent gland again and he whines a little. “Hyung, I… I really… I wanna be an omega…” Words are hard even now. God.


But Sion only smiles still, still, still, and he’s still gentle and still kind and still the best, like, ever. “Riku,” Sion hyung coos again and his voice is so low that it sings in Riku’s veins. “Can you take off your pants? I wanna see something.”


It’s like he’s underwater. Sion just asked something insane and Riku shouldn’t even listen to him because he’s already playing with fire by letting Sion know that he wants to be bitched at all, right, the things they’re saying to each other are already toeing the line far too much. But Sion’s gaze is intense and he’s Riku’s leader and the man he has to obey without question. 


And he… it feels like he wants him, doesn’t it? Maybe? Riku wants to hope and so he hopes and so he nods. His voice is tiny, microscopic. “Okay, hyung…”


It’s awkward. But Sion lets go of him so Riku can shimmy out of his sweats and then, when he’s prodded again, he pulls down his boxers too. Both pieces of clothing flop to the floor and Riku feels exposed, again, sitting here without pants. But Sion’s smile widens and he says next: “Now spread your legs, Riku. Lemme see you.”


This is crazy, right? All of these requests are fucking crazy. It feels like something insane is about to happen and it definitely is, but of course Riku still listens no matter what. He turns to Sion and very, very slowly spreads his thighs apart. The angle is awkward and so he falls back on his elbows, but that’s- it’s fine. 


Everything is fine, right? It is. Everything will be okay as long as Sion hyung keeps looking at him like that…


“Wow,” Sion says. He cranes in closer, cranes over him, and Riku shifts onto his back as his pack alpha leans in just to stare directly at his hole. “See, I knew you’d be good for it. You’d look so cute with something in you.” And he doesn’t touch him, either, but Sion’s cock is rock hard and he’s leaking too.


Maybe this is all very insane, sure, but Riku can only lay back and whine as Sion stares at him and his eyes roam all over him and Sion looks from Riku’s belly to his v-line to his dick to his ass. Then Riku spreads himself a little wider and feels really, really lightheaded when Sion’s scent rises stronger in the air. Does that mean he… does he like what he sees?


Riku’s hands twist into the sheets as he lets Sion inspect him. Alphas aren’t usually made to submit but he can’t fucking help it when Sion is craned down over him like this; Riku stretches his neck out and bares his throat and leaks more and more and more when Sion realizes he’s submitting and his hyung’s grins only widens. He looks and smells and seems so pleased and Riku keens again. “Hyung…”


“Riku,” Sion says. Just his voice is enough to make Riku whimper. “You really want it, huh? You wanna be bitched?”


He says it so plainly but it’s just true. Riku nods and his voice comes out whiny and needy and desperate: “Y-yeah…”


Sion touches him, but not where he wants it - his hand curls over his knee, grips onto his thigh, thumbs at the stretch of his muscles. “And who do you want to bitch you?” Sion asks in an even lower voice. “What alpha would be the best at it?”


Normally Riku can’t make eye contact to save his life but Sion’s staring into his soul and he has to know the truth. Only a moment passes before he breathes: “I-I want hyung to do it…”


It’s hard for him to actually say it because they’re both alphas and they’re groupmates and even more than that they’re the leaders of a pack of pups who are all going to be force-proximitied into codependency for the next decade give or take. But Sion is still smiling even though the truth is so fucking shameful and then he leans in even closer with that hungry look still in his eyes. He only asks: “Really? You want hyung to do it?”


He says hyung like he’s the only hyung Riku knows: he moves slowly like he’s waiting for Riku to push him off. But of course Riku lets Sion settle down over him, completely in his space, close enough that they’re sharing breath. They’re belly to belly and chest to chest and Riku can count Sion’s eyelashes as something hard digs into his hip. 


“Please, hyung,” Riku mumbles. “I-I need you…”


The admittance feels crazy but once again Sion only smiles something hungry. “You need me.” Except this time it isn’t a question and he doesn’t wait for a response, either - Sion leans back just enough to take Riku’s hips in both of his hands and then dips his head down to noses criminally slow over Riku’s chest and over Riku’s collarbone and into Riku’s neck. Fuck, he’s- he’s so close.


“Hyung, I really… really need you…” Riku wishes they would kiss and he’s thinking of asking to kiss, too. But then Sion inhales Riku at his throat and a hand comes up to cradle his nape and his mind goes completely blank.


“You smell so good, Riku. So sweet. ‘S like you’re already an omega.” Sion’s voice rumbles into his skin and then he mouths at his pulse point: “Could make you my omega. Could make you smell like me.”


Fuck, just those words make Riku whine again. Because then that- that’s all insane, the things that Sion wants and the things that Sion’s promising him and the things that Sion’s saying. If Sion helped Riku transition into being an omega it’d take years of knotting and HRT and a lot of other things and it’d be a fucking commitment, really, it’d be the kind of commitment you only make when you want to mate someone. Riku couldn’t possibly do all of that when he’s an idol and everyone’s watching his every move and there’s no physical way to do anything without drawing attention to himself, but still, Sion says all of this like he’d do it if they could. 


God. He says could make you my omega and Riku wonders if he was really cursed to present as an alpha because Sion was destined to just make him his omega anyway. But holy shit, this is- this is crazy. 


It’s crazy and so, so, so good.


Every movement is slow and kind of hazy and for the life of him Riku can’t even hear that damn video anymore. Sion leans up only to nose at his jaw this time. “So cute,” he murmurs. They’re close enough that they could kiss but they don’t. Sion’s voice is so low that it reverberates into his skin: “Riku, I’ve always thought you were so cute. I’ve always wanted to be your alpha.”


And that’s- that’s kind of mind-boggling, too. But Riku can’t even respond because Sion then reaches down and he takes both of their cocks in one fist and his hand is so big and calloused and warm. “H-hyung-” Riku gasps and Sion squeezes down on him, his free hand lets go of his nape only to skate down his side and between his legs and press at Riku’s hole. And that’s also so- it’s just so fucking-


“If I tried,” Sion says into his cheek, “I think I could fit inside you. Think I could knot you.”


God, he’s crazy. Or, well, this is all crazy. Riku whines and he can’t fucking help it because he clings onto Sion’s shoulders and he tells him: “Please, hyung, I want it…” For a while he wanted to try and keep his dignity intact but that’s impossible now that Sion’s here and Sion wants him and Sion’s offering to- to bitch him. And to be his alpha, too? Holy shit. “Hyung please, need you in m-me…”


Maybe all of this should be humiliating to admit but Sion only groans in response. “You want it?” And he doesn’t sound disbelieving, really, but he still asks like he needs to hear Riku’s answer. “You need me, Riku? You need me in you?”


“Yeah,” Riku moans. “I- hyung, I really-”


Sion then nips at him, his teeth sharp alpha and a little mean. “You want your alpha to bitch you, huh, baby?” Then he groans into Riku’s cheek. “Fuck, Riku, I’ll give you anything.”


He- he called him baby. Holy shit. Riku clings to him even harder and hides his face in Sion’s neck. “Please, hyungie, I need you so badly…”


“Riku,” Sion clings back at him and murmurs into his temple. “Riku, I-“ And then, of all things, he presses a kiss there. 


Riku can hardly think anything coherent and this is all crazy as it is, of course, but then it very quickly gets even crazier. Sion makes a little groaning sound and suddenly leans back onto his haunches, taking Riku with him while tight in his arms, and he’s so surprisingly strong that even Riku’s caught off guard as he’s suddenly lifted off of his back and up into the air. 


“Hyung, wait, you-” Riku keens, too, but in this position he falls right into Sion’s lap and he never thought he’d be here but he loves it.


“Baby,” Sion groans back at him. “Baby, come here. Lemme hold you.”


They settle into it, sitting upright and all tangled up together, and Riku can’t even argue when Sion seems to like this so much - he’s making plenty of noises now, nosing into Riku’s cheek and fondling him all down his back and his hips and his ass and groaning all the while. And being manhandled, too, is- well, you know. Riku certainly isn’t complaining.


“Hyung,” he buries his face in Sion’s shoulder and then he moans as a big palm squeezes his ass. “Oh, hyung, please-“


“I can’t believe how pretty you are,” Sion hyung groans. In a firm movement he squeezes both of their cocks in one palm and then his other hand reaches back down to thumb at Riku’s hole, pressing at him there like he wants to fit inside. “I heard that if you knot an alpha enough times they start getting wet,” Sion breathes. “Wanna see you get wet for me, Riku, god.”


It’s terrible how good Sion is at saying dirty things because Riku can only mewl as his hole is rubbed at, as his cock is squeezed, as Sion lets him cling even closer. He buries his face into Sion’s neck and keeps moaning and moaning and moaning. He wishes he were an omega so his hyung could just sink inside him but this is so good too, Sion pressing at him like he could rub him loose. Sion touches him like he doesn’t care what kind of hole Riku has, like he’s still gonna fuck him either way. Holy shit. 


“P-please,” Riku begs. “Please, hyung, I want you to- I’ve always wanted you to-”


“Always?” Sion’s voice is a growl but he still sounds so pleased, somehow. “Fucking hell, baby, I should’ve known.”


Riku doesn’t know how to take this, really, like on a deep level. Does this mean Sion likes him? Does Sion genuinely want to make him his omega? Would they even be able to do that with the job they have? But all those questions quickly leave his mind as Sion’s fingers abandon his hole only so his hyung can spit into his hand, and that’s- the action is so shocking that Riku’s a little disturbed, actually.  


But then those fingers are skating back down his spine and between his asscheeks and down to- fuck. Sion’s fingers are prodding at his hole again but this time they’re wet and now he, too, feels wet. It’s like he’s leaking. What the hell. 


“Not gonna do anything, ‘m just curious,” Sion says at his ear. He isn’t trying to finger him but Sion’s rubbing at him and playing with his- with his ass. And Riku fucking wants those fingers in him, really, he wants to be stretched open and made to take it so badly he could die.


“I-” Riku whines into Sion’s skin because he can’t even believe they’re touching like this, too, but now they are and he’s desperate for more. “I really- I want you to- hyung, in me, please-“


“Not now,” Sion presses a kiss to his ear and that’s worse, actually, because it’s a little too tender for what they’re doing. “Not yet. Have you fingered yourself before, baby?”


Again, that fucking pet name is gonna drive him insane. “No, hyung,” Riku moans. “But I- I want you to-”


“You’d let me?” Sion breathes. “You want your alpha to teach you how to take it, huh?”


God, how is he even able to say these things? Riku whines something broken but nods all the same. “Please…”


“‘S okay,” Sion noses into his cheek. “You’re so good, Riku. You’re my perfect omega. Just look at how you-” Then he groans when Riku clenches down on him. “Yeah, fucking hell, you’re so sexy like this.”


Riku doesn’t even know what to say but he can’t stop moaning and he wants to know, really, if Sion actually wants to be his alpha like he says he does. “You-“ He pants. “You think I’m sexy?”


But maybe that’s a stupid question because Oh Sion only says things he very much means and never in a million years would he go around wanting to be someone’s alpha unless he was ready to commit. A hand squeezes Riku’s asscheek, hard enough for it to sting, and even that feels like a claim. “I do,” Sion groans. “I always have. I’ve always wanted you, baby.”


God, the fact that Sion is only ever honest makes the admittance even worse - Riku can’t believe that they’ve known each other for over a year and yet Sion was, what, also attracted to him? Even though he was also- even though he’s always-


“But I’m an alpha,” Riku moans. “And I don’t- if I can’t-”


“No matter what you are, I’m gonna want you,” Sion promises into his ear. “And the second we have time, I’m gonna stretch you out and teach you how to take my cock. I don’t even have to bitch you. But god, I wanna-” Sion squeezes his ass again. “Riku, baby, I wanna be your alpha.”


Sion says it like he means every single word and it’s just- Riku’s so turned on and so overwhelmed and also feeling a little touched, somehow, because he had no idea Sion felt that way about him. “You wanna be my alpha?” Riku whines; it’s only half because of the sex.


“Yes, baby, god,” Sion bites into his cheek. “Even if you aren’t an omega, I’m gonna make you mine.”


This is too much, is all Riku can really think, because Sion thumbs at his hole again and grunts a little as he lets go of their cocks. But it’s also a bit confusing what Sion’s planning because then he’s again lifting Riku by the hips and Riku just moans a confused thing. “Hyung, you’re- what are you-”


“Riku, baby, need you closer,” Sion moans back at him. “I just wanna-”


This is actually a little deranged because Sion lifts Riku just enough to fit his cock between his legs and under his dick and he’s- he’s rubbing at his hole. Like, he’s rubbing at his hole with his cock. Then Sion presses them in even closer together, crotch to crotch and belly to belly and grinds up against him. “W-wait,” Riku moans a very strained sound because this is so fucking hot, what the fuck. Like this, it’s like- it’s like Sion hyung’s just using him.


“You don’t like this?” Now they’re nose to nose again and Sion’s basically breathing into his mouth. God, Riku wants his hyung to inhale him. Holy shit.


“No, I- I love it, I-” Riku’s voice warbles and Sion’s hand closes back around his dick and it’s this is even worse, somehow, Sion touching him without anything else in the way. “Alpha,” Riku moans, “it feels so good.”


“Does it?” Sion sounds a little crazed and it’s kind of humiliating that they’re just, like, humping against each other even though it’s still so hot. “Baby,” Sion moans back at him. “My baby, wanna make you feel good.” 


Fucking hell. Riku wants to kiss him so badly and he wonders if he’s allowed to. He is, right? Or is that still much too soon? But then Sion’s leaning back just far enough so he can look Riku in the eyes and that makes him feel a new kind of vulnerable, Sion looking at him while he just- he’s using him, isn’t he? He’s grinding at his hole and squeezing his ass and playing with him. It really just feels like Sion hyung owns him right now…


“Hyung,” Riku pants, staring back into Sion’s eyes. Normally he’d be looking away but he’s obsessed with how Sion stares at him like he’s starving because it makes him feel small and wanted and so, so good. “Hyung, I- I really-“


“I’m so close,” Sion only grunts. “You’re so fucking pretty, what the fuck.”


Riku doesn’t know how to take that. He holds onto Sion’s shoulders and freely moans even though he knows with the thin dorm walls he should really be quieter. But it’s just hard not to make all this noise when Sion looks at him like that and Sion touches him like that and Sion wants to be his alpha and Sion rubs at his hole like he- like he owns him there, too. God, really, Sion can own all of him if he wants to.


“Wish you could- wish you were inside me,” Riku admits in a low, warbling voice. “Hyung, I want you to- want you to be my alpha, please.”


It’s embarrassing to admit that now but Sion smiles something a little too affectionate for what they’re doing. “I can be your alpha,” he promises him. “Riku, I’ll give you anything. I’ll do anything you want me to, baby, I will.”


It really isn’t fair how sweet Sion is even while doing something so deranged and Riku feels a little helpless as he’s jerked off and rubbed at and doted on. Sion presses back in to nose at his cheek and that’s not fair, either, because the action is deceptively cute and Riku didn’t know he’d ever think that Oh Sion was cute. But he is, isn’t he? Sion is so, so, so cute.


“Want you to- to bitch me,” Riku whines because he’s close. “Alpha, I want you to- I wanna be your-“


“Soon,” Sion says like it’s a promise. “I- I wanna-” He squeezes Riku’s ass again, presses at his hole again. “Gonna fit in here, baby. Gonna knot you.”


God, the promise of a knot is just too much. Riku moans and clings on even harder because Sion rubs between his thighs and it already feels like he’s getting fucked. “Please,” Riku moans and moans and moans. “Please, hyung, I-”


“Close,” Sion groans back. “Baby, I’m so close.”


Riku feels helpless. He doesn’t know how to get his alpha closer but he grinds up into Sion’s hand, squeezes his ass down on his cock, adjusts the angle so the head rubs at his hole head-on. “Like this,” Riku keens. “Like this, we can- you could- it’s like you’re fucking me, Alpha.”


Sion pants into his cheek. “Baby,” he says. “Baby, I wanna-” Then his cock kicks and Riku can even feel it, what the hell. 


“Please,” Riku slurs a little but that’s because he’s salivating at the thought of Sion rubbing into him so hard he comes all over his hole; cum marks last on your skin for weeks, holy shit, Riku would reek of him. And then that thought only makes him whine even more. “Please, Alpha, I need it.”


This is bad, this is terrible, this is so wonderful and so sexy and everything Riku’s ever wanted. Sion moans back at him and squeezes him in closer, closer, closer. “Riku,” he pants. “Riku, baby, you wanna be my omega?”


“Yes,” Riku moans back at him. “Yes, hyung, please, I’ve always wanted you to be my- want you to be my mate.”


Sion groans. Loudly. It’s loud enough for the others to hear, fucking hell, but then he’s pushing Riku onto his back with a growl and the movement is so swift that Riku can only whine again and again and again. His legs are spread and Sion is grinding hard and rough against his hole and it’s like he’s being fucked as Riku chokes on a moan.


“Hyung, wait,” he mewls. “Hyung, it’s like you’re- it’s like you’re really-”


“Riku,” Sion groans. And then he yanks him into a kiss and just like that, he comes.


There’s a lot going on at once. Like, a lot. Riku is distracted by the kiss enough that he doesn’t realize Sion came at first, but Sion licks and pants and nips at him and he’s breathing through his release as something wet, wet, wet spills down Riku’s ass. Holy shit. He mewls and Sion kisses him even more and this is the meanest Riku’s ever been kissed. And he loves it too, fuck. He wants Sion to kiss him all the goddamn time because he’s always wanted his hyung to kiss him.


“Baby,” Sion moans as he comes down from his climax. And then he pulls away, just enough to look down at Riku’s hole, and hisses. “Fuck. It’s like- it looks like I filled you.”


It’s mean of him to say that when Riku has been pushing down his need for Sion to fuck him for a year now, but still, there’s something sexily humiliating about the way Sion spreads him apart as he rubs his cum right onto his hole. Fuck. Riku takes his own cock in hand but that’s because he’s so turned on he might die, actually, as Sion’s fingers prod at him with his own spend.


“So cute. It’s like ‘m leaking out of you, baby.” Sion squeezes Riku’s hip with one hand and keeps staring, keeps rubbing at him, keeping marking himself into his skin. “You’re gonna smell like me. Everyone’s gonna know just who you belong to.”


That’s crazy, too. Riku has never stopped to think about whether Sion would be a possessive alpha because he’s laid back in the all the ways most alphas are annoying and perpetually unbearing to be around, and yet Sion has no qualms about saying such demanding things while Riku’s marked by his cum. “H-hyung,” Riku whimpers. “Hyung, I’m yours…”


His voice is whiny with Sion inspecting him and he jerks himself off in a rough, rough fist as Sion only looks back up at his face. Riku wants to kiss again but he also weirdly likes being looked at like this. And that’s- that’s new. Normally he’s embarrassed by eye contact because he’s embarrassed about the alpha parts of his physique, but Sion looks down at him like he’s hungry and like he likes him and like he needs him and like he wants him to be- he really wants Riku to be his mate, doesn’t he?


“You’re mine, baby, right?” Sion takes Riku’s hand off of his cock and replaces it with his own, and of course that’s even better. Riku’s hands are bigger but Sion’s are rougher, meaner, handsier, warm and calloused and firm. They’re rough from the farm, he’s said before, I wasn’t allowed to do much but I got into all kinds of trouble and messed around with all kinds of shit. And those worn hands manhandling him is-


“‘M yours,” Riku pants. “I want you to be my alpha and I wanna be your omega and-” He cuts himself off with a moan as Sion squeezes his cock. “Hyung, I want you to make me your omega, please…”


Normally this would feel embarrassing to say but it’s only true, really, and now that he knows he’s allowed to have this he fucking wants it. Riku needs Sion in him and he needs Sion bitching him and he needs Sion to own him and he needs them to belong to each other, like, forever. Riku had always resigned himself to being only half-enthusiastic about his designation but he thinks he could deal with being an alpha if Sion was the one taking care of him; he wouldn’t mind having to be an alpha if Sion was his mate, at least, because Sion doesn’t expect him to act like an alpha at all. 


Even if Riku can’t really transition into being an omega, Sion still- Sion still sees him as one, doesn’t he? Can’t he just be Sion’s omega no matter what?


“Gonna make you my omega, baby, don’t worry,” Sion leans back in to kiss him. And really, the kissing just makes things even better because Sion’s lips are soft and greedy and he’s a very good kisser. “Are you close, Riku? You can mark me, too.”


Wow, that’s- maybe it’s dumb that Riku hadn’t even considered the thought, right? But he’s an alpha and if he came on Sion’s skin he’d reek of bergamot and yuzu for weeks. And then it’d be like Sion is his and Riku would smell like him in return and they’d be each other’s and that is even more insane than anything else they’ve done tonight. They’ve done fifty million insane things already but holy shit. Fuck.


Riku’s cock kicks, which is pathetic and he knows it and yet he’s swayed all the same. “Can I- can I really?” He sounds desperate, too, but that’s because he is. “I can mark you?”


“Yes, baby, I want you to,” Sion says into his cheek. “Hyung’s yours too, hm? Want everyone to know it.”


It’s a pipe dream because it would take a million years before anyone would bother to suspect two alpha packmates are together, especially in a boy group of pups with terrible noses, but Riku wants it so badly he aches. “I- I’m close,” he moans. “Hyung, I’m so-”


“Lemme see you come,” Sion kisses him, again, with his wonderful mouth. “You’re so good, aren’t you? I wanna see you, baby.”


“Hyung,” Riku just sniffles in response. He’s toeing the line but this is all so fucking good that he never wants it to end. “Hyung, I’m gonna- I think I’ll-” Then he keens something pained. “C-close…”


“Baby,” Sion’s voice is deadly low, so low that it echoes in his veins. “Baby, come for me. What do you do when your alpha tells you to come, hm?”


And well, that’s- that’s enough to ruin him, actually. “I- I-” Riku is about to respond but he doesn’t have it in him when he’s this on-edge and it feels this good and everything is so overwhelming and- and holy shit, he thinks he might love this man.


“Riku,” Sion coos. “My Riku. Can you come for your alpha? Please?”


It’s terrible that that’s what does him in, really, but of course it does; Riku spills into his fist and can only cry out. “Hyung…”


His orgasm feels a little pathetic, too, but Riku can’t fucking help it because Sion bears down on him and his dick is smushed between their bellies and his cum marks both of them. “So good,” Sion praises him through another kiss. “You’re such a good boy, aren’t you? You marked me, baby, thank you.”


It’s crazy. Riku had no idea Sion would be this kind of alpha in bed, praising and loving and doting, but of course he is. Riku just whines a little more through his release and yet Sion is there through it all, kissing him and running a hand through his hair and telling him he’s good.


“Sorry,” Riku mumbles once he’s done spilling; it was a lot. “I don’t get off very often, hyung, I came a l-lot…”


Riku says it like he’s embarrassed but Sion only separates just enough to send him a sweet smile. “I noticed. It’s okay, baby, let me clean you up.”


Even now Sion is doting as he hunts down a towel from his closet and wipes Riku down so he’s free of sweat and cum marks and whatever the fuck else. The phone on the nightstand has long gone dark, too, and maybe this should be a little awkward when things got so intense so quickly. But then, when Sion’s done, he only leans in and cups Riku’s face. “Can I kiss you?”


And, well, the answer to his question feels obvious because Riku just confessed to wanting to be his omega and everything, but all of this has also left him feeling extremely embarrassed and he looks away with a pink face even though they both know exactly what he wants. “You can…”


He doesn’t mean for it to sound so coy either. But Sion huffs out a little laugh and tilts his head face-on and kisses him anyway, so.


It’s surprisingly gentle, really, even after everything - the kiss is chaste and firm and perfect and Riku feels a little dazed when Sion pulls away again. His hyung chuckles: “Seriously, even for an alpha you’re so cute.”


That’s what he’s thinking now? Riku goes pink. “You- you think so?”


It’s hard not to be embarrassed but Sion only smiles and kisses him again. “Absolutely. But you wanna be a cute omega, too, huh?” Then his smile widens when Riku nods. “Of course you do. So let’s do this a lot, okay? Then you’ll know just how good of an omega you are…”


Wow. Wow. Riku feels so unbelievably dazed, only nodding. “O-okay…”


Riku’s happy to lay there and be kissed, though he’d be lying if the affection wasn’t making him feel a little horny again; he breathes hard when Sion pulls away, a little out of breath. And Riku’s mind is blank, too, because his hyung calling him an omega over and over again is arguably the most incredible thing that’s ever happened to him. So Sion really doesn’t need him to keep pretending with the alpha stuff, huh…


This is bad because Riku’s dazed and pliant and willing to submit but Sion just leans back so he can smile down at him. “Good boy. And when we have time, I’ll take such good care of you…” A hand wanders down Riku’s arm to squeeze his hand. “You still want me to fuck you?”


He says that instead of bitching, which is nice, because bitching is a very long and involved process that Riku isn’t entirely sure they have the bandwidth as idols to commit to. So he just nods, shy, because he wants it. “I do….”


But then, because he’s terrible, Sion’s grin only widens. “Really? You do?”


The fact that he’s teasing is a little mean when it feels like Riku’s already told him how badly he wants it a million times over; he can’t help but huff. “You- of course I do.” And then his bottom lip juts out.


Riku’s indignation isn’t helping anything but it’s hard to not be admonished after- well, didn’t they just do all of that? But Sion squeezes his hand again and he, too, looks a little embarrassed. “I just wanted to make sure. But before that, we can…” Then Sion presses in closer and pets over Riku’s hair. “Let’s go shopping or something, okay? We’ll go on a date.”


A date, Sion says. Really, he wants to go on a- a date? It’s stupid that the offer is even surprising but somehow Riku still wasn’t expecting it. He blinks, very slowly, and then he goes even redder. “A date?” Oh, are they- god, they’re dating now, aren’t they?


“Of course,” Sion’s is pink, too, but he’s still smiling. “It’s proper etiquette to take someone on a date when you want to court them, Riku. And if I’m gonna be your alpha then I have to court you…”


Then Sion leans down to kiss him like what he just said was no big deal at all even though they’re both red in the face and obviously this is a huge fucking deal. But Riku kisses him back and his arms loop around Sion’s neck because he wants that too, so badly, being courted and being his and going on a date. They- he gets to go on a date with Sion. Wow.


“So we’re boyfriends,” Riku mumbles into his hyung’s mouth. He sounds a bit like an idiot but that’s because all of this is still a little crazy to him and his mind is still completely empty of any coherent thoughts. “Er, well. Can we be boyfriends?”


“Yes. Please, actually, I-” Sion leans back and turns away, then, somehow looking even more embarrassed than Riku feels. “I really want you to be mine. And only mine. So let’s- let’s date.”


Wow. Riku’s seen Sion get embarrassed before but this is something entirely new because this is apparently how Oh Sion blushes when he asks people out. And that’s just fucking crazy, isn’t it? This is the face Sion makes when he asks people out and Riku knows that Sion’s never dated anyone so that means Riku’s the only one who’s ever seen him like this. No one else ever has and no one else ever- no one else ever will, either. 


Now Sion’s really his. That’s so crazy! 


“I’m yours, then,” Riku tells Sion in a pleased voice. His hands trail up his hyung’s arms just to squeeze at his biceps, his shoulders, then loop around his neck. “And you, too, you’re… you’re mine. Right?”


Deep down Riku wants to have a full freak-out about this - because holy shit, he’s been crushing on this guy for over a year and now they’re dating! - but when Sion finally looks back at him he’s grinning something brilliant and he’s so handsome and sweet and amazing and he- wow, Riku doesn’t know if he’s ever seen Sion smile like that before, either. 


Sion dips his head down to nuzzle at his cheek and it’s surprisingly cute, actually, how he digs into Riku’s skin like he wants them to become one. “Of course. And no one else can take you from me, can they?” The fact that he’s even asking is insane but alas, Riku already knew his alpha was insane.


“Only you, hyung,” Riku promises in an even more smug voice. “I’ve never wanted anyone else, either…”


A few hours ago a confession like that would have felt humiliating to admit because it’s just true, really - Riku never dated in high school since male omegas have a weird stigma about them, and then he presented as alpha against his will, and then he later became a trainee, and it’s just been an uphill battle to even feel settled in his body. But he feels no such shame now and Sion is, like, the most ideal person to have a crush on ever. He’s always been so nice and handsome and kind and Riku had fallen for him pretty much immediately, too. Even though Riku never dared to even entertain the idea of Sion like him back, now he just feels… well, you know. 


Apparently he was wrong about that. And Riku’s very, very happy to have been wrong.


“You’ve never-” For a second Sion looks speechless and his mouth opens and closes like he doesn’t even know what to say. But then, after another second of staring, his face breaks into an absurdly goofy grin. “R-really? You’ve never liked anyone else?” Seriously, Riku’s never seen Sion smile like this before. “Like- like, ever?”


Riku has no fucking idea why his hyung - his boyfriend - looks so pleased about this but it’s still true, so he just nods as Sion drags him into another kiss. “Yeah,” Riku says. “I never really had crushes on other people but I always knew I wanted you...”


He’s only telling the truth but Sion’s over the moon like this is the best thing that’s ever happened to him. “God, Riku,” he kisses him again and again and again. “Ever since Lastart, I’ve-” And then kisses him again. “I’ve liked you. I’ve been obsessed with you.” And then there’s another kiss and another and another and-


And, well, Sion’s confession somehow feels funnier than Riku’s because Riku had no idea that Oh Sion, one of the most straight-forward people he’s ever met, could be so good at hiding a so-called obsession. But Sion’s hand cradles his face and Riku can tell he means it because Sion kisses him like he’s been waiting to do it for ages. And god, that’s- it’s so wonderful.


“That’s good…” Riku feels a little more embarrassed now that he’s getting a reaction like this and he wants to know more about this supposed crush, too, but that can wait for another time. “So you- you better keep being obsessed with me, hyung, because now we’re dating.” It comes out a little too coy but he means it.


“I will,” Sion promises, both of his hands squeezing Riku’s hips yet again. “Riku, I really- I’m gonna make you sick of me.”


It’s nice to have this, at least, after what they just did. But now that they’ve confessed their feelings the energy between them is much more settled than it ever was before, that stilted hyung-dongsaeng thing that’s still blooming and delicate and unsure. But Sion feels sure now, his touch firm and his voice even firmer like he means every word. Riku wants to believe him and so he’s going to believe him; he’s going to believe that Sion likes him as an alpha or as an omega or even both or neither. And he’s going to believe that Sion wants to take him on a date. And now Sion’s his boyfriend and Sion’s his alpha and- and then, maybe even worse than that, Sion wants to knot him. 


Wow, that’s also kind of embarrassing to think about. Riku goes pink as his alpha cuddles him but that’s fine, too, because Sion holds him to his chest like he belongs there and it feels great to finally feel like he belongs. “I wanna sleep together,” Sion even says. “D’you think we can both fit in your bed?”


“In my-” For a second Riku’s surprised because he didn’t think Sion, very practical in almost every way conceivable, would want to do something as silly as cram together in Riku’s twin bed. But their eyes meet and Sion blinks something innocent and holy shit, he’s even cuter now. Riku has to resist the urge to coo at him. “I don’t know. You know I sweat a lot…” The admittance makes him cringe but it’s true, isn’t it.


“It’s okay,” Sion insists, though. “I just wanna hold you. Can I hold you, baby?”


He’s so- was Oh Sion always this overbearing? Apparently so. Riku definitely should’ve seen this coming. “You’re gonna hate it, though,” he still tries convincing this stubborn alpha. “You’re gonna think it’s gross, so-“


“No, I’m pretty sure I can manage,” Sion tells him because either way he’s still the most unrelenting person Riku’s ever met. Er, or maybe second after Yushi. “Come on. Let me have this with you, okay?”


Riku’s weary, of course, but that’s because Sion goes about even inane things like a man on a mission. And yet he just sighs a little and follows when his boyfriend pulls him along: “Okay, fine…”


So they go, crossing the two feet between their beds, and it’s actually pretty ridiculous that they’re doing this because they’re both sizeable alphas with wide shoulders and barely even fit side-by-side. But Riku loops his towel around his neck and he rolls into Sion’s arms and Sion holds him tight like he really is his alpha and that’s just- it’s really nice. 


“If you think the sweat’s gross, just leave and go sleep in your own bed,” Riku mumbles as Sion leans down to kiss him. “I don’t want you to think I’m gross, hyung…”


“I’m not gonna think that,” Sion says. And he’s insistent about this, too, because his voice is firm even as he teases: “I think you’re beautiful, Riku. And you’re cute and handsome and sexy and-”


“Okay,” Riku huffs a tiny, fond thing even though his ears are bright red. He curls into Sion’s neck and accepts his fate, sweat and proximity and tiny bed and all. “But I warned you, you know.”


“Yes, baby,” Sion smiles into his forehead. “Don’t worry about me. Just sleep well, okay?”


And, well, it’s not like Sion’s gonna relent now. Riku just sighs and squeezes in even closer. “You too, hyung…”


Wow. They both fade off into sleepy silence and Riku tries not to stew since he’s finally gotten what he’s been yearning for for a year - like really, he and Sion hyung are dating - but he still can’t help but think about how batshit insane it is for them to commit to each other when their future is one big idol-shaped question mark. But Riku can feel Sion’s heart beat under his hand and it’s firm and steady and as naive as the thought is, it’s hard not to be incredibly hopeful that they’ll be together forever. Sion wants to be there for him no matter what and Sion likes him regardless of the gender he’s been assigned as and Sion never promises something unless he’s willing to die on that incredibly specific hill. That’s why it’s hard not to feel giddy and excited and hopeful; Sion’s always been a good alpha and a good leader and a good hyung; when he says he’s committing to something, it’s just in your best interest to believe him. 


He’s stubborn in that way, too, always insistent on seeing things through until the very end, and it’s something Riku has always admired about his leader but now that may just be his favorite thing about him. It- it’s really just amazing, isn’t it? How could Oh Sion, always so rational and practical and logical to a fault, decide that it’s worth the risk of dating him? 


Maybe this is incredibly stupid but Riku wants this and he wants him and he wants to believe that no matter what happens with the group or their jobs or them, Sion still wants to be his alpha. And I want him to be my alpha, Riku thinks to himself as he slowly drifts off to sleep. He’s already my alpha. But if I wake up in the morning and he’s still here I’ll just do whatever he wants and let him have me forever and ever and ever…


It’s a dumb way to make that decision, he knows, but he’s a sweaty sleeper and Sion isn’t the type to suffer for no reason. The doting could always be a cover, couldn’t it, so wouldn’t that change once he realized that they definitely shouldn’t be sharing a bed? But Riku eventually nods off to sleep and then he wakes at the crack of dawn and then he still in Sion’s arms while his boyfriend’s drenched in his- in his literal fucking sweat.


Which is- and he’s-


Holy shit, why the fuck is Sion still in bed if he’s covered in sweat? Riku jolts up, immediately beyond horrified. “Hyung, what are you-”


He pushes at Sion’s shoulder and the stupid alpha just yawns and blinks up at him. He’s so- since when could Sion play so nonchalant, too, covered in Riku’s sweat and overheating in the middle of summer? “What?” Sion mumbles something sleepy and tries pulling him back into his arms. “We can sleep in for another ten minutes, don’t be so loud…”


“But you’re-” Riku is still so fucking flabbergasted, is the thing, because he had assumed that his boyfriend would have better self preservation skills than this. “But you’re- you’re covered in my sweat, hyung.”


But bizarrely enough, Sion just shrugs up at him. “‘S fine. Now I smell more like you.”


Wow. Wow, this is- this is bad. This is really bad and wonderful and amazing and every good feeling in the world. Riku lets himself be yanked back into Sion’s arms and into his shoulder and into his neck where his scent is the strongest and now it smells like the both of them. “You-” Riku is still speechless, though. He can’t believe this alpha is real. He just can’t.


“You’re causing a lot of fuss for-” Sion checks his phone. “Jesus, Riku, it’s six. We should still be asleep.”


Sion is so unperturbed, pressing a kiss to Riku’s cheek before sleepily plopping back down onto his sweat-soaked pillow. Riku can only stare down at him in response, really. Is Sion actually being serious? Does this really mean that he’s the- like, the literal best alpha in the world? Does it? Or is he still asleep and this is a dream—?


Maybe it’s Riku’s fault for being disbelieving, but still, he didn’t quite realize just what Oh Sion’s devotion would look like in practice. He can only lay back down and still stare at his alpha’s face, his alpha who cracks an eye open to look at him right back. “No need to stare,” Sion chides with a sleepy, smug little grin. “‘S all yours. Forever, too.”


Wow. He’s half asleep and talking nonsense and yet Riku’s feeling inclined to believe him. He squeezes Sion’s hand. “Forever?” And he still feels incredulous, too, but it’s also hard not to feel fond when his boyfriend is already being so disgustingly sweet to him.


“Yeah,” Sion hums. Then he leans forward to kiss him, just one peck, and smiles again. “So Riku, seriously, go back to sleep. And I’m your alpha, so you have to listen.”


This is nothing more than an absurdly quiet moment in the grand scheme of things - usually they’re knee-deep in chaos and that’s something they thrive in, too, neverending chaos - and yet everything Sion’s saying sounds so unbelievably ridiculous. In a good way, sure, but it’s absurd all the same. Of course Sion is a wonderful boyfriend and of course Sion’s promising him forever and of course Riku really, truly believes him. But he already knew he was insane, didn’t he, so this is-


Well. This is just par for the course, too; they’re both insane and that’s why they may as well just be meant for each other, yeah? Riku smiles a defeated, fond thing. “But I’m also an alpha, hyung…”


He only says it to be annoying, really, but predictably Sion just makes a face in response. “First of all, you’re my omega,” he tugs Riku in close. “But if you’re gonna pull the alpha card, I’m your hyung. So listen to me and go back to sleep, baby.” And then Sion squeezes him pointedly right into his chest and they’re both covered in sweat now. 


Well, it’s dumb that Riku listens and it’s dumb that now, before his career’s even really started, he’s putting all of himself in Sion’s hands. But Riku just grins something frightfully silly and noses into Sion’s neck and of course he fucking listens, he’s never disobeyed his leader and he never will. “Okay, alpha.”


There’s a peck to his head. “Good boy,” Sion coos. And then there’s another kiss to his temple. And then to his cheek and his nose and his chin and-


“Hyung,” Riku complains. “What are you-“


They only get another half hour of sleep, but still, it’s maybe the best sleep Riku’s ever gotten in his life. And when he wakes up, Sion’s still there and sweat-soaked and his. They kiss and they hug and it feels like a promise - a real promise - no matter whatever storm they’re about to face head-on. The sounds of pups slowly filter to life in the dorm around them, too, but in their shared room it can just be them. And Riku doesn’t even have to be an alpha here, does he? He only has to be Sion’s.


They get ready for the day in tandem and it’s only when Riku stands at their bedroom mirror and fixes on his practice clothes that Sion really intervenes at all; he comes up to his side and wraps his arm around Riku’s shoulder. “Cute,” Sion says at his ear. And then, with a hand squeezing his hip: “And this is all mine, right?”


Riku leans into his arm easily and it feels like he’s always belonged there and so, of course, he smiles. “Yes, alpha,” Riku promises. “Forever, too.”


Sion just laughs something pleased and kisses him again. And again and again and again, and then even more, even to the point that they’re late for their call time and a manager ends up banging on the door. But that’s fine because Sion leads him out by the hand and they smell like each other and Riku never has to be someone he isn’t as long as this man is his leader, right? Riku trusts Sion more than he trusts anyone and whatever his hyung says goes. If Sion says he’s an omega, he’s an omega. If Sion says he’s his alpha, then he’s his alpha. If Sion promises him forever, then they’re- then they have forever with each other.


They try to act nonchalant around the others but Sion catches him very briefly right before they slip into the car. He swipes a wrist over Riku’s nape and his smile is a little too smug. “My omega,” he murmurs. “Don’t go anywhere without my scent, okay?”


“Okay,” Riku agrees easily because of course he does. And then he reaches up to scent his alpha back, his wrist rubbing over Sion’s nape and his fingers pressed into his scent gland. “And you’re also… you’re mine, too.”


Sion grins and squeezes his hand once before slipping into the passenger seat. And Riku, feeling the most settled in his skin he’s felt since his alpha presentation, slots himself into the backseat and right into the familiar squabbling of his pups while they both clamor for scentings of their own.


Sakuya makes a face. “Eugh, you smell like hyung…”


“That evil man tainted our Nii-chan,” Ryo complains, devastated, as Sion just cackles from the front seat. “Don’t laugh, you monster, that’s so mean!”


It’s silly. It’s silly but it’s also really, really nice to have his pack and it’s nice to belong to his hyung and it’s nice to just be himself. So really, Riku can deal with being an alpha for now - he has a whole lifetime of being Sion’s to look forward to, doesn’t he?